• Name: Alexa Chung
  • Age: 28
  • Occupation: TV presenter
  • Best work: Frock Me
  • Worst work: Get a Grip (shudder!)
  • Worth: £££
  • Significant others: Alex Turner
  • Most likely to: date the coolest rock star of the moment

Angular Hampshire lass who quit modelling in Tampax adverts to present Popworld, then T4, then Frock Me, but is more famous for her selfless outreach work with the paparazzi, whom she graces with her pouty-party face every single night. Hangs out with the Daddy Bought Me A Pony gang of Kelly Osbourne, and Geldof sprogs. Dates Alex Turner and says she won’t be the kind of starlet who gets her knockers out because she wants to talk about books on Radio 4 one day. Which would explain her weekly column in the Independent, where she discussed trips to Tescos and “wanting my cold sore to be discussed on my own terms.” Mark Lawson must be quaking in his boots. Can currently be seen flying between the UK and the US as they argue about who gets to keep her, unfortunately, not in a good way.

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