If you’re not a teenage girl or a Hollyoaks actress, there’s a very good chance you’ve never set foot in Lipsy. It’s a brand that trades in short dresses best worn to Tiger Tiger, and by choosing Pixie Lott (who is scientifically proven to be unrecognisable to anyone over 25) to ‘design’ for them, they solve two problems: getting more publicity, and giving Pixie something to actually do.

East London is amazing place, being one of the only places on the entire planet you can go without a single shred of originality or creativity and call yourself an artist. Twinned with Williamsburg in New York it's home to one of the largest collections of pretentious daddy-funded no-hopers ever found in the wild. Of course this is an absolute dream for any advertising exec, they know all you've got to do to separate the moustachioed sitar players from their cash is slap the word retro on whatever you're pushing and the locals will sell their grandmothers just to get a glimpse of your nouveau faux tat.