In HM's very own version of Sophie's Choice, you have to choose - Kelly Brook on the front of the new issue of Esquire or Katy Perry on the front of the new issue of Vanity Fair... Or we could always chuck in THIS wildcard...

Of course, we'd never so crude to make it a competition between Kelly Brook's breasts and Katy Perry's tits - we should also take into consideration the content of the accompanying interviews...

Kelly on her career in Esquire:

“[In Piranha 3D] was hanging from this rope in this tiny red bikini while these two blokes pinched and prodded me all over. They were basically paid to pinch my bum.”

Katy on her career in Vanity:

"My sponge is so big and wide and I'm soaking everything up and my mind has been radically expanded. My career is like an artichoke. People might think that the leaves are tasty and buttered up and delicious, and they don’t even know that there’s something magical hidden at the base of it. There’s a whole other side [of me] that people didn’t know existed."

Kelly on family/relationships in Esquire:

"The previous guys [I have dated] have been big kids really. Show-offs. [New man]Thom's not an actor, so I don't have to watch all of his s*** films.

"[The pregnancy] wasn't a plan, but if it happened, it happened. We were boyfriend and girlfriend."

Katy on family/relationships in Vanity Fair:

"I come from a very non-accepting family, but I’m very accepting,

"Russell is into Hinduism, and I’m not really involved in it. He meditates in the morning and the evening and I’m starting to do it more because it really centers me. 

Kelly on her mum's opinion of her in Esquire:

“My mum says, ‘You fall in shit but you come out smelling of roses.’ I’ve made quite a successful career out of being a failure.”

Katy's mum's opinion of her daughter in Vanity Fair:

"The Lord told us when I was pregnant with her that she would do this."

And Brook's the winner! Now go and buy the mag - out tomorrow.