Whilst everyone else spends time recovering from their Christmas or are sunning themselves in hotter climates, Aisleyne threw back her head and laughed in their faces. She's a canny one - knowing full well that if she slipped into the little black dress, made sure the twins were saying hello and got completely hammered in the freezing cold the pictures would be gratefully lapped up by people like me, as if we are all mere baby birds gratefully gobbling down a worm thrown to us by our mothers.
Or something.
Round of applause is due to you though Aisleyne. Bravo.
WAIT! THERE'S MORE!
Big Brother winner Pete Bennett gets married, amazing photos
P Diddy pays tribute to Notorious BIG by acting like an absolute cockend
Peaches Geldof and Eli Roth continue their thinly-veiled bout of self validation
Ronnie Wood visits the country with girlfriend, look like murderers
Jennifer Aniston & Gerard Butler get sexy for W Magazine ahead of Bounty Hunter release
Elton John's Oscar party, posh looks drunk, Cowell's breasts
Chanelle Hayes still pregnant, goes out with Robbie Coltrane
Take That's Mark Owen gets busted for 10 affairs
Daisy Lowe slips into a swimsuit and pair of hot-pants for Louis Vuitton bag campaign
X Factor's Rachel Adedeji gets the Holy Moly Interrogation
Katie Price sends saucy texts to Brazilian toyboy Andre Pinto
X Factor's Lucie Jones gets a Holy Moly Interrogation
When Holy Moly met JLS
How much is your sex tape worth?
What is so damn great about Blighty?
COMMENTS (9)
Is that an ample bosom? Looks like a couple of litres of spray-tanned silicone to me.
Loving the River Island carrier bag though. You can take the girl out of Romford...
Fair play Mr HM, the barrel is indeed empty, but we're all mortally bored and at least this dopy bint has been decent enough to stick her head above the parapet for us to take a shot at.
HM - go piss in that news barrel! GIve us more - The Linda item yesterday was a good thing. Now, just shuffle out another offering. No need to strain. It's just there ready to pop out of your mind. No proof needed - just vicious sordid, unsubstantiated gossip from a good, trusted place. No one's here anyway, so no one will know... just us. Go on. Cat Deeley, Gok Wan, Joss Stone, Johnny Ball... We're not fussy.
She really is an ugly pig
我也觉得她很丑
What a fucking scrubber
It's like when Iron Maiden slipped 'Bring Your Daughter To The Slaughter' into #1, between Christmas and New Year, when no one was looking.
....actually it's nothing like that in the slightest. Who the hell is this Horking-Implants doilum anyway?
She needs hitting in the face with the biggest shit-coated plank of nailed wood ever. What an absolute twat