Don't look at me!
Wed, 03/03/2010 - 11:37 by HM writer

As Sonique, Nicola T and Lindsey Dawn McKenzie were more than happy to be photographed outside Mahiki (the night could have only got more glamorous had Siavash turned up) Lindsay Lohan opted for the back exit in an attempt to avoid all the paparazzi because, as we all know, that girl just hates attention...

Meanwhile, it's being reported that Lohan will be writing her biography (about seven years too late in the world of celebrity) telling OK! magazine:

"I write a lot and it's very therapeutic for me because then I can see what's happening on paper. I've started writing a book.

"It's going to take a while, all my life experiences. I started writing it a year ago. There's a lot to put down, you know?"

Well, a few paragraphs at least.

SPOILER ALERT:

Became an actress

Did some Disney films, then some straight-to-DVD ones

Won a few Razzies

Took drugs, drank alcohol

Went to rehab

Stopped drugs, stopped drinking alcohol

Started taking drugs, drinking alcohol again

Went to rehab to avoid prison

(Reportedly) gave Calum Best a blow job, filmed it

Pretends be bisexual

Looks old

Designs leggings

The End.

Edit: Single-handedly stops child trafficking in India

  • this girl needs a good discipline on an alcohol addiction center. if i am not wrong she is using drugs too. i really loved the movies where she was playing.

    yasmine Sun, 21/11/2010 - 19:20
  • I think the pre-requisite to get in Mahiki is that you have to be a self-obsessed, up-yer-own-arse megacunt with the likeability of brain cancer. Oh, and dress like a spastic. I can't see anyone in those pics who didn't fit that description

    koshmar Sun, 07/03/2010 - 13:20
  • "working with Meryl Streep,Robert De Niro"

    I once played footy against Peter Beardsley and Chris Waddle for a semi-pro team, does that make me a premier league footballer?

    you stupid cunt

    koshmar Sun, 07/03/2010 - 13:16
  • I love the fact that she's hiding. It puts me in mind of that Simpsons when Bart gets Ralph to play hide n' seek and then doesn't bother looking for him.

    psammmead Thu, 04/03/2010 - 10:25
  • my god, thats the ultimate revenge isnt it, writing an auto-biography,? dont you have to be in your 60s to do that? ohh well i think she will die soon anyway so she better bring one out. The least she can do is come out the front its like she thinks she is better than the others, i think not they are all way better than you now. you shouldnt have to cover your head people are like "ohh thats that girl lohan or something, remember, the one from mean girls".

    dancingworm Wed, 03/03/2010 - 23:53
  • What? She's writing a book so she can see what's happening on paper? Can she not see what's happening to her now?

    Still the book, if she ever writes it, will be a success (Oprah will see to that). She'll make a tonne of cash, then star in th mini-series, probably as her own dad, then hook up with Madonna's old leftovers Heysoos.

    PuddyTwat Wed, 03/03/2010 - 15:43
  • Oh sorry, 'and saved orphans from Haiti rubble with her bare hands'. Is Front row a euphemism as opposed to Back door? Frankly, I wouldn't. But then I have self esteem and self respect and I'm not a fuck up. Well not as much a one as her. I mean if was old man RC.

    stella ah trois Wed, 03/03/2010 - 15:33
  • sonique is 'girl' for sonic fyi

    switch Wed, 03/03/2010 - 14:54
  • how about

    working with Meryl Streep,Robert De Niro
    Bobby nominated for Golden Globe
    Haiti Charity
    Front row with Robert Cavalli

    Johnym Wed, 03/03/2010 - 12:51
  • Hey, you forgot 'ended child poverty in the Indian Sub-continent'.

    stella ah trois Wed, 03/03/2010 - 11:54
  • Hey, you forgot 'ended child poverty in the Indian Sub-continent'.

    stella ah trois Wed, 03/03/2010 - 11:54
  • how about

    working with Meryl Streep,Robert De Niro
    Bobby nominated for Golden Globe
    Haiti Charity
    Front row with Robert Cavalli

    Johnym Wed, 03/03/2010 - 12:51
  • sonique is 'girl' for sonic fyi

    switch Wed, 03/03/2010 - 14:54
  • Oh sorry, 'and saved orphans from Haiti rubble with her bare hands'. Is Front row a euphemism as opposed to Back door? Frankly, I wouldn't. But then I have self esteem and self respect and I'm not a fuck up. Well not as much a one as her. I mean if was old man RC.

    stella ah trois Wed, 03/03/2010 - 15:33
  • What? She's writing a book so she can see what's happening on paper? Can she not see what's happening to her now?

    Still the book, if she ever writes it, will be a success (Oprah will see to that). She'll make a tonne of cash, then star in th mini-series, probably as her own dad, then hook up with Madonna's old leftovers Heysoos.

    PuddyTwat Wed, 03/03/2010 - 15:43
  • my god, thats the ultimate revenge isnt it, writing an auto-biography,? dont you have to be in your 60s to do that? ohh well i think she will die soon anyway so she better bring one out. The least she can do is come out the front its like she thinks she is better than the others, i think not they are all way better than you now. you shouldnt have to cover your head people are like "ohh thats that girl lohan or something, remember, the one from mean girls".

    dancingworm Wed, 03/03/2010 - 23:53
  • I love the fact that she's hiding. It puts me in mind of that Simpsons when Bart gets Ralph to play hide n' seek and then doesn't bother looking for him.

    psammmead Thu, 04/03/2010 - 10:25
  • "working with Meryl Streep,Robert De Niro"

    I once played footy against Peter Beardsley and Chris Waddle for a semi-pro team, does that make me a premier league footballer?

    you stupid cunt

    koshmar Sun, 07/03/2010 - 13:16
  • I think the pre-requisite to get in Mahiki is that you have to be a self-obsessed, up-yer-own-arse megacunt with the likeability of brain cancer. Oh, and dress like a spastic. I can't see anyone in those pics who didn't fit that description

    koshmar Sun, 07/03/2010 - 13:20
  • this girl needs a good discipline on an alcohol addiction center. if i am not wrong she is using drugs too. i really loved the movies where she was playing.

    yasmine Sun, 21/11/2010 - 19:20

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