Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie reportedly split up, our hope in love dies

Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie reportedly split up

Mr and Mrs Split (sorry)

Sun, 24/01/2010 - 13:09 by HM writer

In a split more earth shattering than Kerry Katona and Brian McFadden's back in 2004, the NOTW are currently reporting that Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie are no more...

According to the NOTW, the Hollywood couple of five years have been consulting divorce lawyers and signed a £205 million split deal. They have legally agreed who will obtain custody of their six children and how to divide their fortune.

Pitt and Jolie will equally divide their wealth and share custody of biological children, 18-month-old twins Vivienne and Knox, and three-year-old Shiloh, and adopted children Maddox, 8, Pax, 6, and Zahara, five, but the children will live with Jolie.

Brangelina reportedly made preparations for their split back in December, but thankfully didn't ruin our Christmas by making the annoucement straight away, and which they have saved to reveal in a few weeks time. Unless this is report proves to be false and they aren't breaking up at all.

A source said:

"The contract was like a tailor-made version of a pre-nuptial agreement except for an unmarried couple's split. It seemed clear they want the world to know they'll both play a part in the upbringing of the children.

"But Angelina will actually be the one who lives with them full-time. There's no date for when the contract would come into effect. But the paperwork is already organised for a break- up - and for it to be as unmessy for them as possible. It is clear it's a case of when they break up rather than if."

'Controversial' Jolie had said in an interview recently:

"I doubt that fidelity is absolutely essential for a relationship. It's worse to leave your partner and talk badly about him afterwards."

"The sparks fly at home if the nice Brad fails to see that he's wrong and reacts in a defiant way. Then I can get so angry that I tear his shirt.

*weeps*

*pins all hope on Russell Brand and Katy Perry*

Angelina Jolie pictures, Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie, Brad Pitt pictures, Celebrity Split, Angelina Jolie, Brad Pitt

Comments

Speculations about the break up of Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie ran rampant on the web, just like the one that just got started on Twitter. I wish they'd just knock it off – it isn't as if it's any of our business or like it makes much of a difference to anyone if they're together or not. It isn't as if someone isn't going to need payday loans any less if they do. They are both great humanitarians, and she's evidently a wonderful mother, having devoted all that time to raising their 6 children and not taking acting lessons.
Jason_I Thu, 28/01/2010 - 09:07
They should have a line up and pick in turns like the old primary school footie selection process!
erniemilko Mon, 25/01/2010 - 16:16
She looks like hard fucking work anyway. And the fact he's now busting the Catweazle look says it all. Still, I suppose 'breaking up oh no we're not" is a lot cheaper than paying for ad space. I still won't be going to see Salt though. It looks as bad as she does.
PuddyTwat Mon, 25/01/2010 - 13:20
Do you think they'll flip coins for the kids ? I bet there's one that neither of them wants.......
MJwasakiddyfiddler Mon, 25/01/2010 - 11:29
Blaaaaaaaarg.
tescopop Mon, 25/01/2010 - 11:03
wow. who saw that coming?
unseemlydogposture Mon, 25/01/2010 - 09:21
"they want the world to know..."

Really? What if the world doesn't want to know? What if the world muttered, rolled over and went back to sleep having been presented with the same story 387 times already?
slug Mon, 25/01/2010 - 09:02
Bradley "the Hunk" morphing into Gary Glitter with the trademark goatee - no wonder she's legged it!
kermits Mon, 25/01/2010 - 08:29
I know she's meant to be the most beautiful woman in the world and all that, but Angelina looks a bit scary, I reckon. Sort of like Cruella de Vil in her early thirties.
Anyway, boo-hoo and bring on the "Brad goes back to Jen" stories.
retrovertigo Sun, 24/01/2010 - 22:57

I know she's meant to be the most beautiful woman in the world and all that, but Angelina looks a bit scary, I reckon. Sort of like Cruella de Vil in her early thirties.
Anyway, boo-hoo and bring on the "Brad goes back to Jen" stories.
retrovertigo Sun, 24/01/2010 - 22:57
Bradley "the Hunk" morphing into Gary Glitter with the trademark goatee - no wonder she's legged it!
kermits Mon, 25/01/2010 - 08:29
"they want the world to know..."

Really? What if the world doesn't want to know? What if the world muttered, rolled over and went back to sleep having been presented with the same story 387 times already?
slug Mon, 25/01/2010 - 09:02
wow. who saw that coming?
unseemlydogposture Mon, 25/01/2010 - 09:21
Blaaaaaaaarg.
tescopop Mon, 25/01/2010 - 11:03
Do you think they'll flip coins for the kids ? I bet there's one that neither of them wants.......
MJwasakiddyfiddler Mon, 25/01/2010 - 11:29
She looks like hard fucking work anyway. And the fact he's now busting the Catweazle look says it all. Still, I suppose 'breaking up oh no we're not" is a lot cheaper than paying for ad space. I still won't be going to see Salt though. It looks as bad as she does.
PuddyTwat Mon, 25/01/2010 - 13:20
They should have a line up and pick in turns like the old primary school footie selection process!
erniemilko Mon, 25/01/2010 - 16:16
Speculations about the break up of Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie ran rampant on the web, just like the one that just got started on Twitter. I wish they'd just knock it off – it isn't as if it's any of our business or like it makes much of a difference to anyone if they're together or not. It isn't as if someone isn't going to need payday loans any less if they do. They are both great humanitarians, and she's evidently a wonderful mother, having devoted all that time to raising their 6 children and not taking acting lessons.
Jason_I Thu, 28/01/2010 - 09:07