Chanelle Hayes does a Claire from Steps* for New, wants to be a glamour model again

5 Chanelle Hayes loses weight Chanelle Hayes and son Blakely advert Chanelle Hayes puts on weight Chanelle Hays for New magazine

Chanelle Hayes reaches new levels of desperation

Nothing New Here

Wed, 20/10/2010 - 11:33 by HM writer

Wow, isn't she brave! Chanelle Hayes was doing her best EVER startled-egg-with-a-pony-tail-on-top impersonation as she stripped off for New magazine to show us the wonders of the airbrush losing weight after giving birth to her beautifully named son Blakely...

Just 13 weeks after having her baby, she's apparently desperate to return to her glamour modelling past (trans: sitting on a lilo naked for a calendar) and has been power-walking her way back to a size 6! And the poor cow enrolled in a boot camp to lose the weight where she was stuck with Kerry Katona, Natasha Hamilton, Chantelle Houghton and Darren Day - surely a fate worse than death, and that's before all the exercising.

Meanwhile, she was trying to recreate her own Ok! magazine style spread with her son Twitter...

Ever the discerning intellect, she told the magazine:

"Pregnancy really changes your body. Everything goes south. I've got a really bad muffin top. My stomach was my favourite part before - I had a little six-pack."

She added:

"I do get a bit obsessive about the way that I look."

Really?? We'd never have guessed, not even when she said this about giving birth!

"I'll make sure I’ve had my hair done, a bikini wax and make-up on at all times. I want to make sure I look good when I’m pushing out a little person!”

: /

*hahahahaha

Chanelle Hayes pictures, Chanelle Hayes

Comments

HM, what do you mean she wants to be a glamma model AGAIN?!?

Was there some point in some parallel universe where she was a major player in the field of "exposing one's giant hard-boiled egg implants" and not just some desperate for fame, ex-Big Brother no-mark taking the filthy notes of Nuts magazine? Or maybe I'm wrong and that is what "glamour" aka "topless" modelling is all about?

Nice tramp-stamp, though. I presume it's used as a targetboard?
kendoddsdadsdogsdead Wed, 20/10/2010 - 14:21
She's got a fat back.

What’s that?

It’s a build-up of fatty deposits just above the belt-line. It’s fairly well concealed in casual clothing, but you don’t want to see her in her underpants!
jiggerycock Wed, 20/10/2010 - 14:11
Her face looks better when she's not too skinny but forcing yourself into a bikini 13 weeks after giving birth and going 'look at these hanging bits' can backfire mightily and do your own nut in. Not that Chanelle's nut could get more scrambled. I actually feel a bit sorry for her, she's only got tabloid toadies to tell her what to do to stay in the news and she's not exactly the brightest button.
Urfugginjokin Wed, 20/10/2010 - 13:13
I kinda like her with a bit of meat on her bones
The Rev Jesse Custer Wed, 20/10/2010 - 13:00
Tis the season when every fat arsed, lardy, minor celebs mind turns to thoughts of the xmas weight loss and exercise video market. Tip for celebs, add ercise to any word to give it that extra impact, note I've already copyrighted Lagercise, the low impact aerobic workout you can do in the pub.
sbayley Wed, 20/10/2010 - 12:55

Tis the season when every fat arsed, lardy, minor celebs mind turns to thoughts of the xmas weight loss and exercise video market. Tip for celebs, add ercise to any word to give it that extra impact, note I've already copyrighted Lagercise, the low impact aerobic workout you can do in the pub.
sbayley Wed, 20/10/2010 - 12:55
I kinda like her with a bit of meat on her bones
The Rev Jesse Custer Wed, 20/10/2010 - 13:00
Her face looks better when she's not too skinny but forcing yourself into a bikini 13 weeks after giving birth and going 'look at these hanging bits' can backfire mightily and do your own nut in. Not that Chanelle's nut could get more scrambled. I actually feel a bit sorry for her, she's only got tabloid toadies to tell her what to do to stay in the news and she's not exactly the brightest button.
Urfugginjokin Wed, 20/10/2010 - 13:13
She's got a fat back.

What’s that?

It’s a build-up of fatty deposits just above the belt-line. It’s fairly well concealed in casual clothing, but you don’t want to see her in her underpants!
jiggerycock Wed, 20/10/2010 - 14:11
HM, what do you mean she wants to be a glamma model AGAIN?!?

Was there some point in some parallel universe where she was a major player in the field of "exposing one's giant hard-boiled egg implants" and not just some desperate for fame, ex-Big Brother no-mark taking the filthy notes of Nuts magazine? Or maybe I'm wrong and that is what "glamour" aka "topless" modelling is all about?

Nice tramp-stamp, though. I presume it's used as a targetboard?
kendoddsdadsdogsdead Wed, 20/10/2010 - 14:21