Ok everyone, this is it, the big push. It looks like we might finally be getting rid of old zeppelin tits and we're going to all have to pull together to make it happen. Positive mental attitude, that's what we need. If we all just believe that maybe Katie Price and her loathesome retinue are leaving the country for good then maybe, just maybe, this time it will actually come true.

So here she is at Heathrow, waiting to board a plane to Leandro Penna's home country, Argentina. Apparently she's going to meet his family and discuss business opportunities. Since she doesn't speak Spanish and he doesn't speak English, it seems like a match made in heaven. Although judging by her most recent autobiography (volume 4 of 28) even if he did decide to take it up, it probably wouldn't be much help.

Of course, no Katie Price story would be complete without a picture of her wearing something retina-scorchingly garish, and luckily for you, we've managed to find just such a collector's item. If you're having trouble telling which one it is, it's the one where she's paired a badly damaged set of net curtains with a charming gold clasp made from a 1970s door knocker.

Also, Gary Cockerill, professional parasite.