Kerry Katona advert outtakes don't do much to help.

Spielberg's finger hovers over speed dial
Mon, 05/10/2009 - 10:00 by Mr. HM

A video full of outtakes from Kerry Katona's Iceland adverts is so obviously a PR stunt or a charm offensive aimed at getting Kerry back into the public's affections after her coke exposé (see various pictures of Kerry Katona for details). It's a shame it does the complete opposite.

If these scenes were taken from the filming of a two hour movie, you could probably understand, but let's not forget that this is all for approximately 20-30 seconds of footage. There are no monologues, nothing to say that isn't more than a paragraph.

She's so "lively' throughout the filming of these it's quite clear she's been on the coke. And the Fanta, and anything else full of sugar that may react against her bi-polar medicine.

My favourite bit, apart from where she goes for cheap laughs by mouthing swear words in front of the children, is the look on the dude's face standing next to her as she fucks up time and time again by not being able to say something like "Prawn rings 50p or free with a Chicken Tikka Lasagne".

Not only is his acting career struggling so much he has to do Iceland adverts, but the poor fucker has to suffer the indignity of standing next to a steaming lump of turd being paid £250,000 a year to gurn her way through something an eye in a jar of jelly could do in it's sleep.

Kerry Katona

Comments

  • She would be hard pressed to get pulled dogging in Essex.

    britt.read Tue, 20/10/2009 - 14:43

  • ...I did find myself knocking one out after watching that tit thing she does. It wasn't over that though. I think I may be more pathetic than her...

    brothbang Tue, 06/10/2009 - 08:36

  • She's one of those gormless wankers who you meet on the bus home after they have spent their night in some sports bar, watching people glass each other.
    She's one of those gormless wankers you cynically befriend on said bus, end up taking home and doing spiteful, atrocious and unhygenic sex acts on, by way of punishing gormless cunt for allowing themselves to continue to exist in such futility, and to push some colourful nastiness into your own putrid existence of working in a call-centre and crying...

    brothbang Tue, 06/10/2009 - 08:34

  • Absolute spud.

    Repugnant Tue, 06/10/2009 - 07:38

  • What a fucking arrogant, prima donna'd, smackable cunt. Who does she think she is, Meryl fucking Streep? Not even MerylfuckingHighground on this showing *slap* sorry, Meryl...

    Blartmonster Mon, 05/10/2009 - 23:02

  • Performance explained by doing a line every time the Director shouted 'Cut!'

    Mr Beefy Mon, 05/10/2009 - 21:25

  • The camera loves you, baby.

    ColonelDebugger Mon, 05/10/2009 - 18:46

  • For me, I'm more than happy to leave her up North where she is for the timebeing.

    kwebb Mon, 05/10/2009 - 17:50

  • You know in the 19th century we used to just draw a line on a map and hey presto make ourselves a new country can't we do that and deport these sorts, or at the very minimum can't we just annexe somewhere like London Zoo release the innocent animals and put Katona, Jordan and her lovely new boyf and their like in there instead - just add a couple of CCTV (without film) to make them happy and then leave them to end their sorry days working on 'new material' and developing personality disorders

    sarahleone Mon, 05/10/2009 - 15:14

  • A cynical attempt to rehabilitate what has become, in the final analysis, a frankly unlikeable "brand", or if we include Iceland itself, brands. It's like watching a bedlam inmate...and just as heartless.

    laurawump Mon, 05/10/2009 - 14:32

  • Coked up out of her fat little brain.

    I really pity the poor little kids who had to put up with that fucking slag giving it the attention seeking bit all day, they were a picture of dignity by the looks of things.

    pandakiller Mon, 05/10/2009 - 13:30

  • ...and pneumatic.

    themonkey Mon, 05/10/2009 - 12:01

  • Her tits are massive.

    janglenuts Mon, 05/10/2009 - 11:48

  • christ, she properly twats him one.

    unseemlydogposture Mon, 05/10/2009 - 11:43

  • God she is such a pikey. I had to abandon watching that after 25 seconds.

    mynicehat Mon, 05/10/2009 - 11:14

  • What a desperately sad indictment of what a total cunthole this country has become when a pointless, talentless cunt like this fat bitch gets paid more than £5 an hour. She should be cleaning toilets, and even that would be too fucking good for her.

    aaaargh Mon, 05/10/2009 - 11:05

  • i quite want to have intercourse with her on this because she has been done up for the adverts,but if i was the bloke she slapped i would give her one allmighty cunt punt....

    jambo Mon, 05/10/2009 - 11:01

  • Is it weird that it sort of made me like her? I mean, if she wasn't so screwed up, she would have been pretty good on TV. Pity.

    scottik Mon, 05/10/2009 - 10:51

  • Worth every penny.

    themonkey Mon, 05/10/2009 - 10:47

  • the only funny thing about this video is the woman at 3 min 39.

    fannyman Mon, 05/10/2009 - 10:39

  • the only funny thing about this video is the woman at 3 min 39.

    fannyman Mon, 05/10/2009 - 10:39

  • Worth every penny.

    themonkey Mon, 05/10/2009 - 10:47

  • Is it weird that it sort of made me like her? I mean, if she wasn't so screwed up, she would have been pretty good on TV. Pity.

    scottik Mon, 05/10/2009 - 10:51

  • i quite want to have intercourse with her on this because she has been done up for the adverts,but if i was the bloke she slapped i would give her one allmighty cunt punt....

    jambo Mon, 05/10/2009 - 11:01

  • What a desperately sad indictment of what a total cunthole this country has become when a pointless, talentless cunt like this fat bitch gets paid more than £5 an hour. She should be cleaning toilets, and even that would be too fucking good for her.

    aaaargh Mon, 05/10/2009 - 11:05

  • God she is such a pikey. I had to abandon watching that after 25 seconds.

    mynicehat Mon, 05/10/2009 - 11:14

  • christ, she properly twats him one.

    unseemlydogposture Mon, 05/10/2009 - 11:43

  • Her tits are massive.

    janglenuts Mon, 05/10/2009 - 11:48

  • ...and pneumatic.

    themonkey Mon, 05/10/2009 - 12:01

  • Coked up out of her fat little brain.

    I really pity the poor little kids who had to put up with that fucking slag giving it the attention seeking bit all day, they were a picture of dignity by the looks of things.

    pandakiller Mon, 05/10/2009 - 13:30

  • A cynical attempt to rehabilitate what has become, in the final analysis, a frankly unlikeable "brand", or if we include Iceland itself, brands. It's like watching a bedlam inmate...and just as heartless.

    laurawump Mon, 05/10/2009 - 14:32

  • You know in the 19th century we used to just draw a line on a map and hey presto make ourselves a new country can't we do that and deport these sorts, or at the very minimum can't we just annexe somewhere like London Zoo release the innocent animals and put Katona, Jordan and her lovely new boyf and their like in there instead - just add a couple of CCTV (without film) to make them happy and then leave them to end their sorry days working on 'new material' and developing personality disorders

    sarahleone Mon, 05/10/2009 - 15:14

  • For me, I'm more than happy to leave her up North where she is for the timebeing.

    kwebb Mon, 05/10/2009 - 17:50

  • The camera loves you, baby.

    ColonelDebugger Mon, 05/10/2009 - 18:46

  • Performance explained by doing a line every time the Director shouted 'Cut!'

    Mr Beefy Mon, 05/10/2009 - 21:25

  • What a fucking arrogant, prima donna'd, smackable cunt. Who does she think she is, Meryl fucking Streep? Not even MerylfuckingHighground on this showing *slap* sorry, Meryl...

    Blartmonster Mon, 05/10/2009 - 23:02

  • Absolute spud.

    Repugnant Tue, 06/10/2009 - 07:38

  • She's one of those gormless wankers who you meet on the bus home after they have spent their night in some sports bar, watching people glass each other.
    She's one of those gormless wankers you cynically befriend on said bus, end up taking home and doing spiteful, atrocious and unhygenic sex acts on, by way of punishing gormless cunt for allowing themselves to continue to exist in such futility, and to push some colourful nastiness into your own putrid existence of working in a call-centre and crying...

    brothbang Tue, 06/10/2009 - 08:34

  • ...I did find myself knocking one out after watching that tit thing she does. It wasn't over that though. I think I may be more pathetic than her...

    brothbang Tue, 06/10/2009 - 08:36

  • She would be hard pressed to get pulled dogging in Essex.

    britt.read Tue, 20/10/2009 - 14:43

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