It certainly does
Tue, 23/03/2010 - 10:43 by Mr. HM

The 'Kick Ass' premiere wheeled into London last night and Brad Pitt made a surprise appearance (he produced it) - but the star of the show was screenwriter Jane Goldman. No wonder Jonathan Ross wears that shit-eating grin...

Also showing up was Mika (has no-one told him it's over yet?), Sam Taylor-Wood and her hostage boyfriend, Jamie Oliver and missus, Dizzee Rascal and who I'm pretty sure is John Culshaw and Imran Khan photographed in 1986.

The film looks absolutely fucking amazing - SERIOUSLY good. Seeing as it has a British director and screenwriter - is it classed as a British film? I don't know how these things work. Hope so - we need something to take the taste of Mamma Mia away. And 'Three not out'. And 'Black Ball'. And 'Sex, Lies and Potato Men.'

 

Oh, and 'It's all gone Pete Tong'.

Here's the trailer for Kick Ass.

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    davidjeff Wed, 09/02/2011 - 16:07
  • Drunk, manky and miserable...yet Brad still looks a lot more content than he did married to Anniston.

    I dont mind Ms Goldman to be honest. She looks great.

    duffpixie Fri, 26/03/2010 - 01:44
  • Everyone is so focused on the woman's flabby tits that they seem to have forgotten that she has a face like a constipated goat

    moon park Thu, 25/03/2010 - 07:54
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    sibat0705 Wed, 24/03/2010 - 13:24
  • Ahem. Yes Rev, of course I knew that...
    All right, hands up, I thought she co-wrote it. I'm the idiot.

    Anyway, while you're here, just to say, I was so fucking furious even with the concept of that TRAVESTY of a remake of 'The Wicker Man' I actually would have slapped Nic Cage's strange paedo-like vizog if I could have gotten close enough. But then, if I'm honest, I'm not sure I'd like to touch him. he's just too eerie and weird.( His mullet in Con Air is a complete frightfest as well....)

    Many's the fine drunken moment I've performed my own version of the Maypole song with spooky Wicker Man dance and scary singing. I own a copy of the original film on dvd SIGNED BY EWA WOOWA plus I have the sound track. No shit. I love it.

    Urfugginjokin Tue, 23/03/2010 - 17:33
  • Stardust was good because Neil Gaiman wrote it, she just did the conversion to screen play.

    The Rev Jesse Custer Tue, 23/03/2010 - 17:00
  • Kermit, he should lose the beard and keep the porn tache and sideburns I reckon (I'm not joking..!)

    Koshmar, I know all about being a writer with very few contacts, I'm not saying it's fair, just that I don't know that she's the worst offender in the nepotism stakes, they really are ALL the fucking same to a greater or lesser degree in the world of 'showbiz, some so blatantly it could make your brain explode with fury... Saying that, there's nothing more excruciating than a shoddily written book so I'll have to take your word for it as I've not read anything by her but I have seen her 'psychic research' show - where's she's kinda like the Nigella of the supernatural world... (Plus I actually didn't mind the film 'Stardust', Bob De Niro dancing around in a corset wasn't the least funny thing I've ever seen and any problems seemed to be with the direction rather than writing).

    She's obviously pissed you off though!

    Urfugginjokin Tue, 23/03/2010 - 16:46
  • Now that he's finished his movie, would Brad Pitt mind an awful lot removing his Gary Glitter's beard? rank!!

    kermits Tue, 23/03/2010 - 15:29
  • I'm sorry but there's a hint of desperation about Goldman. The red/pink hair look has worn a bit thin now, spesh as she's touching her 40s. Sure she's got her own career, but seeing as she met Wossy when she was 16, married him at 18, I'd suggest she, like many others do, benefitted from the contacts made through her liaison with him, rather than the hard work most writers would have to go through.

    And I can assure you, having read one of her X-Files books (I bought one as a gift, daft cunt that I was), that her writing panache isn't that great

    koshmar Tue, 23/03/2010 - 15:12
  • Ps. Good luck hanging onto your hostage boyf STW. Look at him. I mean good God (another 70s style phwoaarr sound)... And look how scared she looks. I suddenly feel a bit sorry for her.

    Urfugginjokin Tue, 23/03/2010 - 14:35
  • Those tits are supported by a hell of a lot of corsetry- trust me, I'm built in a similar manner and it requires a lot of smoke and mirrors and engineering to make 'em look that good once you get over 35. But I think she looks lovely, is wearing a great dress and her pink/red hair suits her (mine never did, not even when I was 19 and it was supposedly 'fashionable' to look like a muppet). Wossy, on the other hand, looks like he just escaped from Spandau Ballet c.1983.

    huxylady Tue, 23/03/2010 - 14:33
  • Jane Goldman was a sixteen year old journalist when she met her husband. She really was going places and everyone knew who she was if they read 'teen' magazines. (Teen magazines were like bibles to young lasses in 1986). I think she wrote for Just 17 which was massive in them there old days. I actually think she dropped back a bit when she got married to JR and had her kids then pushed forward again with her own projects in the last seven years or so. I think she's gorgeous, and have had my own hair that colour more than once (and I'm in my thirties). She's got massive knockers, proper hips and I've never seen her starving and clawing her way up the red carpet like most of those lanky freakazoid clones so not a bad role model. (Don't know if she's a nice person coz I've never spoken to her)...

    Anyway, the point I'm making is simply, as celebrities go, she seems to have her own mind and her own ideas. Love or hate her writing, she was doing it before she met him and all things considered probably made contacts through Ross's career but didn't, for many years, seem to be making much effort to use his success to her own advantage (or did I miss something?) Contrast that with Jules Oliver, that Gordon Ramsey's wife (don't know her name) and a myriad other 'other halves' who get the offers rolling in for no discernible talent, simply coz they're with a 'celebrity', It's so annoying, but I'm not sure she's one of them. And I'm not sure I wouldn't at least cash in a teensy bit if my fella was as famous as hers is. (Though not for much longer methinks)

    Urfugginjokin Tue, 23/03/2010 - 14:32
  • Soapy Tit Wank? That's how the wrinkly cunt attracts the talent.

    Oh, that, and money and a way into the film industry...

    koshmar Tue, 23/03/2010 - 14:28
  • Hang on Puddy - I get sick to the fucking back teeth of this celeb shit of "Hey she's got X kids, wow ain't she looking great!" bollocks.

    1 - she will have had a personal trainer and nutritionist to get her bod back to standard

    2 - there'll be an army of nannies to feed the wailing cunt (no, not Wossy) in the middle of the night and see to every little demand

    and 3 - she'll have had the old Caesarian (like all celebs and wives) to keep what would otherwise be a gaping minge nice and tight for Wossy's wiener.

    And still dyeing her hair pink at the age of 40+ ? Christ

    koshmar Tue, 23/03/2010 - 14:12
  • HA ! yeah like there was ANY chance I was going to watch that.

    The Rev Jesse Custer Tue, 23/03/2010 - 13:58
  • The Wicker Man remake. Say no more.

    dandyboy Tue, 23/03/2010 - 13:56
  • I will never forgive Nic Cage for his one line in National Treasure said which so much over drama that I wanted to throw my dog through the telly...."Ok (dramatic pause) I'm gonna steal the declaration independence (thoughtful look....exhale)"

    Oh and Ghostrider - total bollocks.

    Fuck off.

    The Rev Jesse Custer Tue, 23/03/2010 - 13:44
  • Did Claudia Schifer think she was going to the Alice In Wonderland premier?

    dandyboy Tue, 23/03/2010 - 13:32
  • Not sure, but does Sean Hughes have a part in it?

    dandyboy Tue, 23/03/2010 - 13:29
  • You do know STW's hostage boyfriend is the star of the film don't you?

    mrparkersdogbite Tue, 23/03/2010 - 13:03
  • Hasn't she got smashing tits?

    *70's style phwooaar sound*

    gago Tue, 23/03/2010 - 12:57
  • Jane Goldman - three kids, don't knock it. And she's getting paid. Although she has got to sleep with Wossy poor cow and his little wooden hard-on so she's not that jammy.

    As for Kick-Ass - I hear it's meant to be good but it's Nic Cage who ought to get his arse kicked in. Over-rated smelly-breathed "actor" who's completely up his own backside.

    .

    PuddyTwat Tue, 23/03/2010 - 12:26
  • Never mind the shit-eating grin he is wearing, what the fuck are those trousers?

    slug Tue, 23/03/2010 - 11:47
  • Jane Goldman is as desperate and self-whoring as her unfunny and overrated/overpaid husband. Have you read any of her stuff? It's like someone programmed a random word generator and left it on by mistake. Funny how pre-Ross she was unknown, and my, how Ross's Film reviews just LOVE her stuff.

    As for all these other luvvy couples - I'm sick of hearing about Taylor-Wood and her pederast obsession - Christ, starve them all of the oxygen of publicity, please

    koshmar Tue, 23/03/2010 - 11:44
  • Middle aged writer wanks over teenage comic

    Verkauf Tue, 23/03/2010 - 11:16
  • Brad Pitt really does like that hat, doesn't he?

    Not that I blame him. It is a nice hat.

    clee984 Tue, 23/03/2010 - 11:15
  • Fuck yeah this film is going to fucking rule !

    Wossy & his Missus look like a demented version of Worzel Gummidge & Aunt Sally

    The Rev Jesse Custer Tue, 23/03/2010 - 10:57
  • Fuck yeah this film is going to fucking rule !

    Wossy & his Missus look like a demented version of Worzel Gummidge & Aunt Sally

    The Rev Jesse Custer Tue, 23/03/2010 - 10:57
  • Brad Pitt really does like that hat, doesn't he?

    Not that I blame him. It is a nice hat.

    clee984 Tue, 23/03/2010 - 11:15
  • Middle aged writer wanks over teenage comic

    Verkauf Tue, 23/03/2010 - 11:16
  • Jane Goldman is as desperate and self-whoring as her unfunny and overrated/overpaid husband. Have you read any of her stuff? It's like someone programmed a random word generator and left it on by mistake. Funny how pre-Ross she was unknown, and my, how Ross's Film reviews just LOVE her stuff.

    As for all these other luvvy couples - I'm sick of hearing about Taylor-Wood and her pederast obsession - Christ, starve them all of the oxygen of publicity, please

    koshmar Tue, 23/03/2010 - 11:44
  • Never mind the shit-eating grin he is wearing, what the fuck are those trousers?

    slug Tue, 23/03/2010 - 11:47
  • Jane Goldman - three kids, don't knock it. And she's getting paid. Although she has got to sleep with Wossy poor cow and his little wooden hard-on so she's not that jammy.

    As for Kick-Ass - I hear it's meant to be good but it's Nic Cage who ought to get his arse kicked in. Over-rated smelly-breathed "actor" who's completely up his own backside.

    .

    PuddyTwat Tue, 23/03/2010 - 12:26
  • Hasn't she got smashing tits?

    *70's style phwooaar sound*

    gago Tue, 23/03/2010 - 12:57
  • You do know STW's hostage boyfriend is the star of the film don't you?

    mrparkersdogbite Tue, 23/03/2010 - 13:03
  • Not sure, but does Sean Hughes have a part in it?

    dandyboy Tue, 23/03/2010 - 13:29
  • Did Claudia Schifer think she was going to the Alice In Wonderland premier?

    dandyboy Tue, 23/03/2010 - 13:32
  • I will never forgive Nic Cage for his one line in National Treasure said which so much over drama that I wanted to throw my dog through the telly...."Ok (dramatic pause) I'm gonna steal the declaration independence (thoughtful look....exhale)"

    Oh and Ghostrider - total bollocks.

    Fuck off.

    The Rev Jesse Custer Tue, 23/03/2010 - 13:44
  • The Wicker Man remake. Say no more.

    dandyboy Tue, 23/03/2010 - 13:56
  • HA ! yeah like there was ANY chance I was going to watch that.

    The Rev Jesse Custer Tue, 23/03/2010 - 13:58
  • Hang on Puddy - I get sick to the fucking back teeth of this celeb shit of "Hey she's got X kids, wow ain't she looking great!" bollocks.

    1 - she will have had a personal trainer and nutritionist to get her bod back to standard

    2 - there'll be an army of nannies to feed the wailing cunt (no, not Wossy) in the middle of the night and see to every little demand

    and 3 - she'll have had the old Caesarian (like all celebs and wives) to keep what would otherwise be a gaping minge nice and tight for Wossy's wiener.

    And still dyeing her hair pink at the age of 40+ ? Christ

    koshmar Tue, 23/03/2010 - 14:12
  • Soapy Tit Wank? That's how the wrinkly cunt attracts the talent.

    Oh, that, and money and a way into the film industry...

    koshmar Tue, 23/03/2010 - 14:28
  • Jane Goldman was a sixteen year old journalist when she met her husband. She really was going places and everyone knew who she was if they read 'teen' magazines. (Teen magazines were like bibles to young lasses in 1986). I think she wrote for Just 17 which was massive in them there old days. I actually think she dropped back a bit when she got married to JR and had her kids then pushed forward again with her own projects in the last seven years or so. I think she's gorgeous, and have had my own hair that colour more than once (and I'm in my thirties). She's got massive knockers, proper hips and I've never seen her starving and clawing her way up the red carpet like most of those lanky freakazoid clones so not a bad role model. (Don't know if she's a nice person coz I've never spoken to her)...

    Anyway, the point I'm making is simply, as celebrities go, she seems to have her own mind and her own ideas. Love or hate her writing, she was doing it before she met him and all things considered probably made contacts through Ross's career but didn't, for many years, seem to be making much effort to use his success to her own advantage (or did I miss something?) Contrast that with Jules Oliver, that Gordon Ramsey's wife (don't know her name) and a myriad other 'other halves' who get the offers rolling in for no discernible talent, simply coz they're with a 'celebrity', It's so annoying, but I'm not sure she's one of them. And I'm not sure I wouldn't at least cash in a teensy bit if my fella was as famous as hers is. (Though not for much longer methinks)

    Urfugginjokin Tue, 23/03/2010 - 14:32
  • Those tits are supported by a hell of a lot of corsetry- trust me, I'm built in a similar manner and it requires a lot of smoke and mirrors and engineering to make 'em look that good once you get over 35. But I think she looks lovely, is wearing a great dress and her pink/red hair suits her (mine never did, not even when I was 19 and it was supposedly 'fashionable' to look like a muppet). Wossy, on the other hand, looks like he just escaped from Spandau Ballet c.1983.

    huxylady Tue, 23/03/2010 - 14:33
  • Ps. Good luck hanging onto your hostage boyf STW. Look at him. I mean good God (another 70s style phwoaarr sound)... And look how scared she looks. I suddenly feel a bit sorry for her.

    Urfugginjokin Tue, 23/03/2010 - 14:35
  • I'm sorry but there's a hint of desperation about Goldman. The red/pink hair look has worn a bit thin now, spesh as she's touching her 40s. Sure she's got her own career, but seeing as she met Wossy when she was 16, married him at 18, I'd suggest she, like many others do, benefitted from the contacts made through her liaison with him, rather than the hard work most writers would have to go through.

    And I can assure you, having read one of her X-Files books (I bought one as a gift, daft cunt that I was), that her writing panache isn't that great

    koshmar Tue, 23/03/2010 - 15:12
  • Now that he's finished his movie, would Brad Pitt mind an awful lot removing his Gary Glitter's beard? rank!!

    kermits Tue, 23/03/2010 - 15:29
  • Kermit, he should lose the beard and keep the porn tache and sideburns I reckon (I'm not joking..!)

    Koshmar, I know all about being a writer with very few contacts, I'm not saying it's fair, just that I don't know that she's the worst offender in the nepotism stakes, they really are ALL the fucking same to a greater or lesser degree in the world of 'showbiz, some so blatantly it could make your brain explode with fury... Saying that, there's nothing more excruciating than a shoddily written book so I'll have to take your word for it as I've not read anything by her but I have seen her 'psychic research' show - where's she's kinda like the Nigella of the supernatural world... (Plus I actually didn't mind the film 'Stardust', Bob De Niro dancing around in a corset wasn't the least funny thing I've ever seen and any problems seemed to be with the direction rather than writing).

    She's obviously pissed you off though!

    Urfugginjokin Tue, 23/03/2010 - 16:46
  • Stardust was good because Neil Gaiman wrote it, she just did the conversion to screen play.

    The Rev Jesse Custer Tue, 23/03/2010 - 17:00
  • Ahem. Yes Rev, of course I knew that...
    All right, hands up, I thought she co-wrote it. I'm the idiot.

    Anyway, while you're here, just to say, I was so fucking furious even with the concept of that TRAVESTY of a remake of 'The Wicker Man' I actually would have slapped Nic Cage's strange paedo-like vizog if I could have gotten close enough. But then, if I'm honest, I'm not sure I'd like to touch him. he's just too eerie and weird.( His mullet in Con Air is a complete frightfest as well....)

    Many's the fine drunken moment I've performed my own version of the Maypole song with spooky Wicker Man dance and scary singing. I own a copy of the original film on dvd SIGNED BY EWA WOOWA plus I have the sound track. No shit. I love it.

    Urfugginjokin Tue, 23/03/2010 - 17:33
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    sibat0705 Wed, 24/03/2010 - 13:24
  • Everyone is so focused on the woman's flabby tits that they seem to have forgotten that she has a face like a constipated goat

    moon park Thu, 25/03/2010 - 07:54
  • Drunk, manky and miserable...yet Brad still looks a lot more content than he did married to Anniston.

    I dont mind Ms Goldman to be honest. She looks great.

    duffpixie Fri, 26/03/2010 - 01:44
  • Nightclub flyers are great for advertising special events, and grand openings. Modern color flyer printing technology allows producing these flyers at a minimal cost, making them affordable for everyday use.

    davidjeff Wed, 09/02/2011 - 16:07

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