Madonna attends Valentino's party with Jesus Luz

Madonna and Jesus Luz at Valentino's party in NYC

Madonna and child

Wed, 04/11/2009 - 15:00 by HM writer

Madonna (minus her neck) took toyboy lover Jesus Luz to fashion designer and human conker Valentino Garavani's launch party in New York. And she actually reminded us less of this and more like this (sort of - with less neck)...

Luz was the DJ for the party (funny that) which was held in honour of Valentino's new documentary, 'Valentino: The Last Emperor'. We hope that doesn't mean he went naked...

According to reports Madge, who has just returned from her fundraising trip to Malawi, has splashed out £30,000 on DJ equipment for her 22-year-old toyboy. We dread to think how he repaid the favour...

Unfortunately he didn't play any Madonna songs last night, saying:

"Sometimes I’ll play something by her. But she’s here tonight and she hears her own stuff almost every day."

Hmmm, this seems like the perfect time to remind ourselves of this.

Paul Oakenfold's still got it...

Madonna and Jesus Luz, Madonna pictures, Jesus Luz, Madonna, madonna

Comments

Dear Madonna,

You are a grotesque old gargoyle with dried up mummified hands that doubtless scare the shit out of your smaller children every time they see those claws looming to snatch them up. Do us all a favour and fuck off.

Kind regards,
etc.

P.S.
Please stop trying to make Baby Jesus 'happen'.
BustySinclair Thu, 05/11/2009 - 11:19
Jesus dont do it you might be able to walk on water, turn water into wine, you aint going to make that a good shag its just a boney old hag
carbon cowboy Wed, 04/11/2009 - 22:44
Fucking hell I thought we'd stopped publishing the halloween photos, Mr HM.......
Blartmonster Wed, 04/11/2009 - 21:37
Nice to see the alien claw is still alive and well in pic 4.
BigPhil Wed, 04/11/2009 - 19:15
So true about the cheeks (laughs)
PuddyTwat Wed, 04/11/2009 - 18:52
Her face powder's stuck to the hairs on her face, just like those biddies that you see on the bus.
PuddyTwat Wed, 04/11/2009 - 18:51
She looks like someone's punched her about five minutes ago and now her cheeks are starting to puff up. She's old, she's had it - FUCK OFF HOME!!!
suckmebeautiful Wed, 04/11/2009 - 18:16
is it just me seeing things or does she have a moustace?
whereswaldo Wed, 04/11/2009 - 17:50
Please don't use that "Madge" word. It makes me want to knock through to next door's lounge and hide behind their couch when I hear it. Such a cringeworthy lame thing that you only ever hear on shit television shows on BBC3 with Sarah Cawood.
kwebb Wed, 04/11/2009 - 17:27
Looks like the lead singer of Mott The Hoople
jiggerycock Wed, 04/11/2009 - 16:39
Y'know, I think even Mr Tesco would stoop to shagging Madge if it would get him £30k of 'dj' 'equipment'. What IS it with men and dj-ing?
tescopop Wed, 04/11/2009 - 15:38
Madonna. Go to the fucking dentist. Your teeth make your tongue look like it's in jail.
kwebb Wed, 04/11/2009 - 15:23
just a pathetic old bag.go home. Oh and for goodness sake woman sort out those hideous excusses for eyebrows
JOHNRBUK Wed, 04/11/2009 - 15:21

just a pathetic old bag.go home. Oh and for goodness sake woman sort out those hideous excusses for eyebrows
JOHNRBUK Wed, 04/11/2009 - 15:21
Madonna. Go to the fucking dentist. Your teeth make your tongue look like it's in jail.
kwebb Wed, 04/11/2009 - 15:23
Y'know, I think even Mr Tesco would stoop to shagging Madge if it would get him £30k of 'dj' 'equipment'. What IS it with men and dj-ing?
tescopop Wed, 04/11/2009 - 15:38
Looks like the lead singer of Mott The Hoople
jiggerycock Wed, 04/11/2009 - 16:39
Please don't use that "Madge" word. It makes me want to knock through to next door's lounge and hide behind their couch when I hear it. Such a cringeworthy lame thing that you only ever hear on shit television shows on BBC3 with Sarah Cawood.
kwebb Wed, 04/11/2009 - 17:27
is it just me seeing things or does she have a moustace?
whereswaldo Wed, 04/11/2009 - 17:50
She looks like someone's punched her about five minutes ago and now her cheeks are starting to puff up. She's old, she's had it - FUCK OFF HOME!!!
suckmebeautiful Wed, 04/11/2009 - 18:16
Her face powder's stuck to the hairs on her face, just like those biddies that you see on the bus.
PuddyTwat Wed, 04/11/2009 - 18:51
So true about the cheeks (laughs)
PuddyTwat Wed, 04/11/2009 - 18:52
Nice to see the alien claw is still alive and well in pic 4.
BigPhil Wed, 04/11/2009 - 19:15
Fucking hell I thought we'd stopped publishing the halloween photos, Mr HM.......
Blartmonster Wed, 04/11/2009 - 21:37
Jesus dont do it you might be able to walk on water, turn water into wine, you aint going to make that a good shag its just a boney old hag
carbon cowboy Wed, 04/11/2009 - 22:44
Dear Madonna,

You are a grotesque old gargoyle with dried up mummified hands that doubtless scare the shit out of your smaller children every time they see those claws looming to snatch them up. Do us all a favour and fuck off.

Kind regards,
etc.

P.S.
Please stop trying to make Baby Jesus 'happen'.
BustySinclair Thu, 05/11/2009 - 11:19