Bless him. He can always do a Joaquin and claim it was for a film role. Auntie Clifford's been giving advice. Reading through it, it explains why most of his clients have died in some way, shape or form. He might be losing his touch. Had to happen. He's about 110.

That main pic, I'd say he looks more blind than cross.

One stop short?
Sorry to say this Jiggery, but the Mel Gibson bus on that one has deffo gone back to the depot!

I feel sorry for him actually.
He was once good looking, a reasonable actor, with some 1/2 decent interesting films under his belt. Then he goes to Hollywood, sells out, snorts half of colombia, disappears up his own arse for 15 years, emerges in a bottle and has stayed there ever since.
He then manages to divorce a very long suffering and loyal wife who has sucked up all his shagging of lap dancers and starlets and ends up in Rasputin's granddaughter's arms, with a cute ickle baybee.
She, in true international Eastern European gangster style, is now trying to rip him off to the tune of 20 million quid (Timothy Dalton being Welsh, she got short shrift there and only a bus ticket when she walked out!).

If these rants were recorded on a comedown Tuesday, no wonder he's angry.

Way to go Mel!
I'd say, go to rehab and then do something worthwhile with your life.
And stop shagging mercenary Russian whores.
The clue's in the nationality.
Not really THAT hard is it?

It's gone beyond offensive now. Beyond funny too. We're into the 'unparodyable' and one stop short of 'piss-soaked tramp shouting at his trousers'.

Could someone ring up the chris moyles show and just play these tapes to him on loop.