Lap dancing for Mickey Rourke must go down (Which is extra) as one of the strangest things an out of work model has to do. How do you know if he's enjoying himself if his face never changes from that half smile-half Rocky look. I love the waistcoats he wears - he looks like Michael Hutchence of INXS fame would if the danger wank hadn't got there first.

God I love Mickey Rourke. He is a masterclass in everything every man should aspire to. Used to be sexy, got pissed took up boxing, drove motorbikes for 10 years, regretted al his excesses, has surgery, wins Oscar. Job done.

Judging by the receipt in his hand, a fair few maidens did grind the Rourke cock that night...

Share

WAIT! THERE'S MORE!

• Either there's drugs stuffed in the cast or Mickey Rourke has bust his arm
• Baftas 2010: Holy Moly on the red carpet, the future of photography
• Mickey Rourke back in London for the BAFTAs, with small bouncer
• Mickey Rourke gets a body double on Passion Play, not very convincing
• Megan Fox and Mickey Rourke filming Passion Play together, weird