The theme for this year's Paris Fashion Week was to wear items of clothing that were as far away from fashion as possible. Or, at least that's how it would appear from the catwalk photographs which we've obtained from over the weekend. Praise the lord that symbol of beauty and perfection, Beth Ditto, was there to save the day...

We would love to be nice and describe these models as 'interesting characters' or something similarly untrue, but if you're going to come out in public dressed in something like this then you can't expect not be called anything but an utter twat.

Allow us to humiliate these utter twats for you one-by-one...

1. Dita Von Teese brought her pet hedgehog along for the day.
2. You never know when you might need a lampshade - best to have it on you at all times.
3. This girl took a practical approach, with inflatable shoulder pads just in case she tripped in those heels.
4. This girl just wore a really shit hat.
5. This is how we reckon John Lennon and Paul McCartney would look today if The Beatles were still going.
6. The worst look out the lot: she came dressed as Geri Halliwell.
7. Finally, our favourite of all the models, who clearly couldn't decide what to wear, so just dressed in. random items from her home: an A4 sheet of paper from the printer, a segment ripped out from her living room carpet and some shiny drapes from her bedroom.

Compared to this lot, Beth Ditto was like an angel sent down from heaven - rocking the catwalk and stealing the show by breaking into the David Brent dance.