Pictures from the Variety Club Awards: true shockers

Kelly Brook at the Variety Club Awards in London

Variety? Are you sure?

Mon, 16/11/2009 - 10:11 by Mr. HM

Whilst we were all stuck at home watching Jamie Afro get the boot and Sam Fox's spider legs in the jungle, scores of brave celebrities battled the elements to go to the Variety Club Awards in London.

Now because the Variety Club is a charity and a very good, noble one at that, it's impossible to take the piss really.

But the cynic in me can't help but think that most of the celebs that arrived did so ONLY because they had been promised an award. Let's look at the evidence:

Justin Lee Collins - TV presenter of the year.
Spandau Ballet - Outstanding Contribution to music.
Pixie Lott - Breakthrough artist

I mean really?

In other pictorial evidence we saw some of the poor unfortunate souls the charity helps, hair that cannot be used in conjuction with a nylon carpet, a smile with such passive aggression it can fell trees, lipstick on teeth and erm, well, erm. Oh goodness.

Kelly Brook pictures, Red Carpet, Kelly Brook, Pixie Lott

Comments

That is as succinct a description as it gets. On the button, mate
Blartmonster Tue, 17/11/2009 - 02:05
And I see the bitterness has finally found its way into Gary Kemp's face.
PuddyTwat Tue, 17/11/2009 - 00:07
Angela Griffin looks as if she's on steroids and what's with the hair?
PuddyTwat Tue, 17/11/2009 - 00:00
These people came out to be noticed. How many of them have pulled their pocket to support a cause? The first thing they do when they get the invite is to ask: "Who else will be coming?" If there's no-one worthy, they'll stay their arses at home. If there's a name, they'll drag their backsides out. And they'll be the first to grab the goodie bag and photo op. They're leeches.
PuddyTwat Mon, 16/11/2009 - 23:57
Someone must have opened a fucking envelope for most of these Z listers to have turned up - it always makes me smile and think of Smashie and Nicey when these self-promoting twats gush about charidee...

"Yeah, mate, I do a lot for charidee,... but I don't like to talk about it..."
Blartmonster Mon, 16/11/2009 - 19:43
Oh no, Patrick Stewart looks so old. I'm really upset now. Bet he wishes he could age as well as McKellen.
tescopop Mon, 16/11/2009 - 13:44
Alesha Dixon is hotter than the sun.

Anyone who goes near any of the Saturdays without at least 3 condoms is committing suicide.

Justin Lee Collins winning an award is clearly a postmodern joke.
grange Mon, 16/11/2009 - 13:32
As perspicacious as ever ever, Tesco. It's as if the official photographer was using a reality lens for once. Loving the toupe on Faryl in pic 18.
stella ah trois Mon, 16/11/2009 - 12:42
More public service from HM - pic 22 - thanks - nearly forgot - it's bin day tomorrow. Now where are those rubbish sacks?
stella ah trois Mon, 16/11/2009 - 12:33
pic 6 - hahahahahha lipstick features hahahaha
nushkat28 Mon, 16/11/2009 - 12:06
Thank you. I miss Footballers' Wives. It was a real eye-opener for my 15-year-old self.

I would actually watch ITV if they repeated it.
tescopop Mon, 16/11/2009 - 11:53
Don't know and yes
Mr. HM Mon, 16/11/2009 - 11:07
Why does everyone look so shit? And is the passive agressive smiley woman Tanya from Footballers' Wives?
tescopop Mon, 16/11/2009 - 10:57
Fella in the background of pic 8 is asking himself "Who the fuck are these people & why the fuck am i here?"
stustustudio Mon, 16/11/2009 - 10:54

Fella in the background of pic 8 is asking himself "Who the fuck are these people & why the fuck am i here?"
stustustudio Mon, 16/11/2009 - 10:54
Why does everyone look so shit? And is the passive agressive smiley woman Tanya from Footballers' Wives?
tescopop Mon, 16/11/2009 - 10:57
Don't know and yes
Mr. HM Mon, 16/11/2009 - 11:07
Thank you. I miss Footballers' Wives. It was a real eye-opener for my 15-year-old self.

I would actually watch ITV if they repeated it.
tescopop Mon, 16/11/2009 - 11:53
pic 6 - hahahahahha lipstick features hahahaha
nushkat28 Mon, 16/11/2009 - 12:06
More public service from HM - pic 22 - thanks - nearly forgot - it's bin day tomorrow. Now where are those rubbish sacks?
stella ah trois Mon, 16/11/2009 - 12:33
As perspicacious as ever ever, Tesco. It's as if the official photographer was using a reality lens for once. Loving the toupe on Faryl in pic 18.
stella ah trois Mon, 16/11/2009 - 12:42
Alesha Dixon is hotter than the sun.

Anyone who goes near any of the Saturdays without at least 3 condoms is committing suicide.

Justin Lee Collins winning an award is clearly a postmodern joke.
grange Mon, 16/11/2009 - 13:32
Oh no, Patrick Stewart looks so old. I'm really upset now. Bet he wishes he could age as well as McKellen.
tescopop Mon, 16/11/2009 - 13:44
Someone must have opened a fucking envelope for most of these Z listers to have turned up - it always makes me smile and think of Smashie and Nicey when these self-promoting twats gush about charidee...

"Yeah, mate, I do a lot for charidee,... but I don't like to talk about it..."
Blartmonster Mon, 16/11/2009 - 19:43
These people came out to be noticed. How many of them have pulled their pocket to support a cause? The first thing they do when they get the invite is to ask: "Who else will be coming?" If there's no-one worthy, they'll stay their arses at home. If there's a name, they'll drag their backsides out. And they'll be the first to grab the goodie bag and photo op. They're leeches.
PuddyTwat Mon, 16/11/2009 - 23:57
Angela Griffin looks as if she's on steroids and what's with the hair?
PuddyTwat Tue, 17/11/2009 - 00:00
And I see the bitterness has finally found its way into Gary Kemp's face.
PuddyTwat Tue, 17/11/2009 - 00:07
That is as succinct a description as it gets. On the button, mate
Blartmonster Tue, 17/11/2009 - 02:05