Wwatching their heavy-petting would most certainly be more terrifying than seeing John Cusack battle global catastrophe (they went to a screening of 2012).

 

Still, Katy Perry must be pretty popular with West Ham after it was reported that the club has "responded to huge demand" and commissioned a special limited-edition range of basques inspired by her MTV stage-wear. A snip at £300 too! The surge in sales means the club should be able to spend some money in the January transfer window - shame it will only be enough to buy Wayne Rooney's little brother though.