If someone said the name 'Fergie' to you, who would be the first person you'd think of? Fergie from the Black Eyed Peas? Manchester United manager Alex Ferguson? Darren Ferguson, son of Manchester United manager Alex Ferguson? Whatever name came to the top of your mind first, it certainly wouldn't be the Duchess of York, Sarah Ferguson. She wasn't invited to the Royal Wedding, so not even her own family care about her anymore, let alone the rest of us. Anyway, she's been feeling very sorry for herself recently - particularly where that nickname 'Fergie' is concerned - so much so that she called up the real Fergie to complain about it.

Ferguson - the Duchess one, not the others - just had the unfortunate experience of being interviewed by Piers Morgan on his mind-numbing CNN show, and revealed the trauma she's been through with everyone stealing her nickname and generally not giving a shit about her anymore.

"At last, someone remembers good ole Fergie."

 

An absolutely tragic starting line...

"You know, on my wedding day, I think there were more people walking their dogs, calling their dogs Fergie. I remember walking through the park and everyone going, 'Fergie!' Now, what have I done?"

 

...and an even more tragic second and third line. She's looking for as much sympathy as she can salvage here, isn't she? We don't think for one second that she or anyone has ever walked through 'the park' and had to put up with 'everyone' shouting her own name at their pet dogs. We might take a trip down to said park later with a clipboard and make a tally of the number of times we hear someone scream 'Fergie, stop humping that boy's leg!'

The Duchess of York went on to reveal that she phoned up Fergie from the Black Eyed Peas in a desperate plea when the singer tried to trademark her nickname:

"The Black Eyed Peas [singer Stacy Ann Ferguson], when she said she tried to copyright Fergie, I rang her up and I said, 'You know, you're trying to copyright Fergie. You've got an album called The Duchess. Excuse me, give me something!"

Poor Fergie. First the dogs, now a pop star... she created the nickname, y'know? It was all her idea. And what does she get in return? Nothing. NOTHING!

"She said, 'Oh, hello'. I said, 'I tell you what, you know what? Come and sing for my charity'. And she did. She came to Wall Street and she sang for the Sarah Ferguson Foundation. And we raised lots of money."

 

Well at least some good as come out of this whole debacle. We just hope that Sarah Ferguson can one day come to terms with the fact that even our aunty's Jack Russel gets more attention than her these days.