Christina Aguilera pulled her pants out of her front-arse, plonked on a wig and transformed herself into Sarah-Jessica Parker minus the chin on the set Burlesque

We're holding judgement on Christina Aguilera - she's managed quite a remarkable transformation since binning those chaps, but this film does look pretty shit, doesn't it? For a start, burlesque is rubbish anyway (either strip or don't - no one really wants to be titillated with some feathers), and then the film has the added problem of Cher, who co-stars. Besides, if we really wanted to see Aguilera do burlesque, we'd re-watch the Lady Marmalade vid.