Vernon's Family Misfortunes
Tue, 09/02/2010 - 13:20 by HM writer

Vernon Kay has admitted that he's been exchanging explicit text and Twitter messages to a 23-year-old Page 3 model called Rhian Sugden, who he met in a Bolton nightclub last year...

It's hardly on the same scale as Tiger Woods or John Terry, but The Sun are refusing to print any of the messages, claiming the contents "too explicit" and could cause offence. But surely they can't be half as offensive as watching him present 'All Star Family Fortunes' or 'Beat The Star' etc, etc.

A source stated the obvious and said:

"This is the last thing Tess will want to hear. She is not one to hold back on dishing out a rollicking. It's fair to say this will go down like a lead balloon.

 

"Vernon has been sending inappropriate messages to Rhian and it's come back to bite him on the a***. He's never had sex with her, but clearly sending a Page 3 girl sexually suggestive messages is not a wise thing to do.

 

"He feels pretty stupid about sending them to her now and is obviously worried what Tess is going to say. She's just had a second child with him so this is the last thing she'll want to hear."

Kay's spokesperson admitted that he did send the incriminating messages but was quick to add that the pair never had "a physical sexual relationship." Tell it to the wife.

Meanwhile, we couldn't find any pictures of the Page 3 model in question, so we thought we'd post some photos of other, similar photos of glamour models out and about instead. You can probably find more here...

  • Thankyou Jig! "A punch up the whiskers" is now my phrase of the month!

    allmouthandtrousers Thu, 11/02/2010 - 15:11
  • Too right. All D-list celeb males should learn from the way Gary Lineker did it.

    merylhighground Thu, 11/02/2010 - 01:35
  • Poor vernon - clearly he pissed his PRs off - he's been known to shag around for ages - just like most D-List male celebs. He's just gutted he's been caught out. I am amazed that these arrogant fuckers think they can get away with it as long as they pay their PR companies vast amounts of money to keep them out of the press. Luck ran out for Tiger, John Terry and Gordan Ramsay. Moral is you can't buy your freedom forever.

    rbtwine Wed, 10/02/2010 - 13:55
  • The most fucking likeable cunt in the biz. Actually, no, he's a complete fucking spazzhead

    koshmar Wed, 10/02/2010 - 01:47
  • "He feels pretty stupid"

    Coincidentally he looks like a fucking moron too.

    BonnyWill Tue, 09/02/2010 - 20:54
  • I like spaz azz

    MJwasakiddyfiddler Tue, 09/02/2010 - 17:54
  • If I was the girl he was sending the texts too, I would have kept quiet about it out of sheer shame. Vernon's got as much sex appeal as a barm cake.

    PuddyTwat Tue, 09/02/2010 - 17:45
  • so what. every man tries to get azz on the side. what's the big deal?

    LondonGoddess Tue, 09/02/2010 - 17:36
  • Should we take it that you are not very fond of Big Vern then Gripper ? :S

    Lanceconstablecuddy Tue, 09/02/2010 - 17:31
  • That would just be boursin.

    stella ah trois Tue, 09/02/2010 - 16:32
  • "She's just had a second child with him so this is the last thing she'll want to hear."

    Point of order, but unless she's one synapse short of Downs, the last thing she'll want to hear is that big gormless streak of piss whispering 'Eh up, nahthen our lass - fancy a punch up th' whiskers, like'

    jiggerycock Tue, 09/02/2010 - 16:21
  • why has no one mentioned that Vernon vernon vernon vernon is a cunt. Say my fucking name again. So and so texts in and says hey vern, vernon vernie vernster the big vern. I hate you you lanky spanky wanky cunt

    grippersteb Tue, 09/02/2010 - 16:07
  • Er, some pun regarding gorgonzola

    dandyboy Tue, 09/02/2010 - 15:41
  • So you have....oh bugger.

    MJwasakiddyfiddler Tue, 09/02/2010 - 15:29
  • ok, now i have.

    unseemlydogposture Tue, 09/02/2010 - 15:22
  • *ROFL* good one Meryl *high fives* that had me FPMSL x x

    MJwasakiddyfiddler Tue, 09/02/2010 - 15:16
  • Those little kisses you put after you read the riot act are so sweet. Admit it, you're just dying to put lol aren't you?

    merylhighground Tue, 09/02/2010 - 15:11
  • i've got the last word though.

    unseemlydogposture Tue, 09/02/2010 - 15:07
  • i was going to say exactly the same thing x

    Mr. HM Tue, 09/02/2010 - 15:00
  • zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

    tescopop Tue, 09/02/2010 - 14:56
  • Why is Kay next to Torville or Dean (whichever is the female one) in the main pic?

    dandyboy Tue, 09/02/2010 - 14:41
  • You're just no fun anymore :(

    MJwasakiddyfiddler Tue, 09/02/2010 - 14:40
  • We don't use unlicensed pictures. Stop being a fucking pedantic twat.

    Mr. HM Tue, 09/02/2010 - 14:30
  • I knew I'd heard her name somewhere before. According to Google, she went out with that cunt with the curly hair from last year's Big Brother.
    Anyway, she's fucked him and Matt Peacock (ex-husband of Jodie Marsh), but still has had more sense than to let Vernon Kay near her. Clever girl. He strikes me as the kind of person who goes to parties and ends up trying to eat trifle with his forehead.

    retrovertigo Tue, 09/02/2010 - 14:21
  • "He feels pretty stupid about sending them to her NOW". That's the telling word in all this, the pigshit-thick fucking numpty.

    dandyboy Tue, 09/02/2010 - 14:17
  • fair enough isn't it? he's a man, she's got a pair of tits...

    unseemlydogposture Tue, 09/02/2010 - 14:04
  • P.s. is the bird in pic 1 related to the girl from the Schwarzenegger classic "Total Recall" ?

    MJwasakiddyfiddler Tue, 09/02/2010 - 13:49
  • Couldn't find any pictures of the model in question ?.....ok try this :-

    1. Go to www.google.com
    2. Switch to image search
    3. Enter Rhian Sugden
    4. Look at pictures

    Surely I'm not the only one thinking this ?

    MJwasakiddyfiddler Tue, 09/02/2010 - 13:47
  • Couldn't find any pictures of the model in question ?.....ok try this :-

    1. Go to www.google.com
    2. Switch to image search
    3. Enter Rhian Sugden
    4. Look at pictures

    Surely I'm not the only one thinking this ?

    MJwasakiddyfiddler Tue, 09/02/2010 - 13:47
  • P.s. is the bird in pic 1 related to the girl from the Schwarzenegger classic "Total Recall" ?

    MJwasakiddyfiddler Tue, 09/02/2010 - 13:49
  • fair enough isn't it? he's a man, she's got a pair of tits...

    unseemlydogposture Tue, 09/02/2010 - 14:04
  • "He feels pretty stupid about sending them to her NOW". That's the telling word in all this, the pigshit-thick fucking numpty.

    dandyboy Tue, 09/02/2010 - 14:17
  • I knew I'd heard her name somewhere before. According to Google, she went out with that cunt with the curly hair from last year's Big Brother.
    Anyway, she's fucked him and Matt Peacock (ex-husband of Jodie Marsh), but still has had more sense than to let Vernon Kay near her. Clever girl. He strikes me as the kind of person who goes to parties and ends up trying to eat trifle with his forehead.

    retrovertigo Tue, 09/02/2010 - 14:21
  • We don't use unlicensed pictures. Stop being a fucking pedantic twat.

    Mr. HM Tue, 09/02/2010 - 14:30
  • You're just no fun anymore :(

    MJwasakiddyfiddler Tue, 09/02/2010 - 14:40
  • Why is Kay next to Torville or Dean (whichever is the female one) in the main pic?

    dandyboy Tue, 09/02/2010 - 14:41
  • zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

    tescopop Tue, 09/02/2010 - 14:56
  • i was going to say exactly the same thing x

    Mr. HM Tue, 09/02/2010 - 15:00
  • i've got the last word though.

    unseemlydogposture Tue, 09/02/2010 - 15:07
  • Those little kisses you put after you read the riot act are so sweet. Admit it, you're just dying to put lol aren't you?

    merylhighground Tue, 09/02/2010 - 15:11
  • *ROFL* good one Meryl *high fives* that had me FPMSL x x

    MJwasakiddyfiddler Tue, 09/02/2010 - 15:16
  • ok, now i have.

    unseemlydogposture Tue, 09/02/2010 - 15:22
  • So you have....oh bugger.

    MJwasakiddyfiddler Tue, 09/02/2010 - 15:29
  • Er, some pun regarding gorgonzola

    dandyboy Tue, 09/02/2010 - 15:41
  • why has no one mentioned that Vernon vernon vernon vernon is a cunt. Say my fucking name again. So and so texts in and says hey vern, vernon vernie vernster the big vern. I hate you you lanky spanky wanky cunt

    grippersteb Tue, 09/02/2010 - 16:07
  • "She's just had a second child with him so this is the last thing she'll want to hear."

    Point of order, but unless she's one synapse short of Downs, the last thing she'll want to hear is that big gormless streak of piss whispering 'Eh up, nahthen our lass - fancy a punch up th' whiskers, like'

    jiggerycock Tue, 09/02/2010 - 16:21
  • That would just be boursin.

    stella ah trois Tue, 09/02/2010 - 16:32
  • Should we take it that you are not very fond of Big Vern then Gripper ? :S

    Lanceconstablecuddy Tue, 09/02/2010 - 17:31
  • so what. every man tries to get azz on the side. what's the big deal?

    LondonGoddess Tue, 09/02/2010 - 17:36
  • If I was the girl he was sending the texts too, I would have kept quiet about it out of sheer shame. Vernon's got as much sex appeal as a barm cake.

    PuddyTwat Tue, 09/02/2010 - 17:45
  • I like spaz azz

    MJwasakiddyfiddler Tue, 09/02/2010 - 17:54
  • "He feels pretty stupid"

    Coincidentally he looks like a fucking moron too.

    BonnyWill Tue, 09/02/2010 - 20:54
  • The most fucking likeable cunt in the biz. Actually, no, he's a complete fucking spazzhead

    koshmar Wed, 10/02/2010 - 01:47
  • Poor vernon - clearly he pissed his PRs off - he's been known to shag around for ages - just like most D-List male celebs. He's just gutted he's been caught out. I am amazed that these arrogant fuckers think they can get away with it as long as they pay their PR companies vast amounts of money to keep them out of the press. Luck ran out for Tiger, John Terry and Gordan Ramsay. Moral is you can't buy your freedom forever.

    rbtwine Wed, 10/02/2010 - 13:55
  • Too right. All D-list celeb males should learn from the way Gary Lineker did it.

    merylhighground Thu, 11/02/2010 - 01:35
  • Thankyou Jig! "A punch up the whiskers" is now my phrase of the month!

    allmouthandtrousers Thu, 11/02/2010 - 15:11

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