Victoria Beckham dresses the part at the launch of David's Adidas line

David and Victoria at the launch of Adidas Beckham by J Bond Collection

Stop right now

Thu, 01/10/2009 - 14:37 by Harry Bow

Yes, Victoria Beckham might have surprised a few people by dressing more suitably for a street corner than a sportswear event last night, but do bear in mind that the weight of an Adidas hoodie would probably topple her right over...

We all know that Victoria Beckham is neither Sporty or Posh, but it looks like she's trying her very best to do something about the latter...

According to the Daily Star, the walking skeleton (so on-trend for Halloween!) has chosen toff socialite Tara Palmer-Tomkinson as her role model as she embarks on elocution lessons (yep, the same TPT who allegedly flashed her tits at Prince William and almost bled Columbia dry of drugs).

A source told the paper:

"Victoria has been keen to live up to her name and speak more properly. She knows she has a very thick British accent and is sometimes misunderstood in America."

Of course! It's not the words coming out of her mouth that are utter shit, just her accent... Meanwhile, David is also rumoured to be doing something about the fact that he sounds like a total plank:

"David is quite keen to move into TV work when he finally retires, probably after the next World Cup. He's got the looks and the knowledge, but knows his voice needs work."

All the speech therapist needs to improve things is a mighty gob-stropper.

David Beckham pictures, David Beckham, Victoria Beckham

Comments

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linktocomputer Sun, 17/01/2010 - 12:08
Derek you scruffy oik, Victoria's dressed to the nines and you're wearing a Hoodie, jeans and prison whites, tosser.
ken tate Thu, 08/10/2009 - 00:02
Ohh My God this is a landmark event they have acctually been seen together for once, not being seen together for years it seems. Body language experts would agree that they do not look like they know each other at all and are just in the photograph for business purposes. Everyone knows that there marriage is like a business partnership not a loving marriage where you make love etc etc etc have breakfast with the children in the morning. David is a slender man and he looks gigantic next to that sort of maniquin next to him but a slightly used one. I hate her face I cannot stand her face, there is something about it that you just want to smash. As for her allecution lessons its better to be seen and not heard for her because if she hasnt eaten for years, Her breath would be very stale, turning people off getting close to her.
dancingworm Fri, 02/10/2009 - 23:43
What a fine, healthy figure of a woman! What amount of radiation would I have to be exposed to in order to get that figure?
retrovertigo Fri, 02/10/2009 - 15:23
Either that or the unending reservoir of darkness masquerading as her mortal soul, condemning her to an eternity of shame, frustration, torment and 'two numbers and the bonus ball' misery,
jiggerycock Fri, 02/10/2009 - 09:38
I think the reason she never smiles is that Beckham has been practicing his signature curve kick on her teeth.
pandakiller Thu, 01/10/2009 - 23:02
What a thought the smell would be like a hot day in Grimsby with a great flock of seagulls following the scrawny tarts about. As for dim boy what on earth does he do for a shag?
carbon cowboy Thu, 01/10/2009 - 20:42
He seems a nice guy, if a little dim. She seems rather fucking hateful and probably wondering what the fuck she has done apart from open her lollysticks to Beckham's man porridge - she and Tompkinson fucking deserve each other. Wonder if they'll be grinding their fishy minges together...?
Blartmonster Thu, 01/10/2009 - 19:47
She puts in in mind of the chicken in "Eraserhead".
Stramash Thu, 01/10/2009 - 17:19
Bleed/bled/bledded Columbia dry? And is a gob-stropper some mouth sharpener? To sharpen up that pout?
themonkey Thu, 01/10/2009 - 16:28
Never mind the trampy outfit (haven't looked past first pic, just assuming), I want to know how much Brylcreem she uses to keep that comb-over plastered to her punctured basketball head.
BustySinclair Thu, 01/10/2009 - 15:00

Never mind the trampy outfit (haven't looked past first pic, just assuming), I want to know how much Brylcreem she uses to keep that comb-over plastered to her punctured basketball head.
BustySinclair Thu, 01/10/2009 - 15:00
Bleed/bled/bledded Columbia dry? And is a gob-stropper some mouth sharpener? To sharpen up that pout?
themonkey Thu, 01/10/2009 - 16:28
She puts in in mind of the chicken in "Eraserhead".
Stramash Thu, 01/10/2009 - 17:19
He seems a nice guy, if a little dim. She seems rather fucking hateful and probably wondering what the fuck she has done apart from open her lollysticks to Beckham's man porridge - she and Tompkinson fucking deserve each other. Wonder if they'll be grinding their fishy minges together...?
Blartmonster Thu, 01/10/2009 - 19:47
What a thought the smell would be like a hot day in Grimsby with a great flock of seagulls following the scrawny tarts about. As for dim boy what on earth does he do for a shag?
carbon cowboy Thu, 01/10/2009 - 20:42
I think the reason she never smiles is that Beckham has been practicing his signature curve kick on her teeth.
pandakiller Thu, 01/10/2009 - 23:02
Either that or the unending reservoir of darkness masquerading as her mortal soul, condemning her to an eternity of shame, frustration, torment and 'two numbers and the bonus ball' misery,
jiggerycock Fri, 02/10/2009 - 09:38
What a fine, healthy figure of a woman! What amount of radiation would I have to be exposed to in order to get that figure?
retrovertigo Fri, 02/10/2009 - 15:23
Ohh My God this is a landmark event they have acctually been seen together for once, not being seen together for years it seems. Body language experts would agree that they do not look like they know each other at all and are just in the photograph for business purposes. Everyone knows that there marriage is like a business partnership not a loving marriage where you make love etc etc etc have breakfast with the children in the morning. David is a slender man and he looks gigantic next to that sort of maniquin next to him but a slightly used one. I hate her face I cannot stand her face, there is something about it that you just want to smash. As for her allecution lessons its better to be seen and not heard for her because if she hasnt eaten for years, Her breath would be very stale, turning people off getting close to her.
dancingworm Fri, 02/10/2009 - 23:43
Derek you scruffy oik, Victoria's dressed to the nines and you're wearing a Hoodie, jeans and prison whites, tosser.
ken tate Thu, 08/10/2009 - 00:02
adidas superstars - adidas superstars available at shell-toes.com over 200 pairs of adidas superstar shoes in stock. 5-day Worldwide delivery available with trackable courier. Visit the home of the adidas superstar today!
linktocomputer Sun, 17/01/2010 - 12:08