Wayne Rooney prostitute: Wayne confesses via text message, brave

5 Wayne gives his best Bukkake face Wayne Rooney and Tevez leaving the Lowry hotel in Manchester advert "And then I fisted her!! LOL" says Wayne Coleen is holed up in her parent's modest 3 up 3 down.

Wayne Rooney prostitute: Wayne gave the thumbs up (right up)

I FCKD PRZZY, SOZ COL :*(

Mon, 06/09/2010 - 09:25 by Mr. HM

After yesterday's revelations about Wayne Rooney dipping his wick into a hooker's vagina, we take comfort in knowing he did the manly thing and told his wife. Via text while she was having her hair done. NIce...!

Yup, nothing says "I'm sorry & I love you" like a text message whilst you're getting ready for a family christening. The couple obviously didn't show up and she legged it to her parents, whilst he sat at home all weekend in his pants looking at Redtube and playing wii bowling*.

Meanwhile more details are emerging of Jennifer Thompson, the woman who only got paid £1000 to sleep with him.

It will shock you to the very core to learn that she met him in the smoking area of a casino for a kiss then arrived at Manchetser's Lowry hotel with a friend, where she informed him she was a prostitute.

Rooney was apparently shy as he'd never had a threesome before, but ever the suave gentlemen - impressed them by paying a member of hotel staff £200 for a packet of Marlboros (he is said to have a 20 a day habit. Cigarettes not prostitues I think).

Classic quotes from the prozzie include:

"The sex was boring."

"Michael Owen was looking at him in disgust" when he saw the pair of them faffing about in a nightclub.

Here are some shy, retiring pictures of her taken from the obligatory social networking website of your choice:

wayne rooney prostitute Jennifer Thompson

What a pleasant young lady! I hope she doesn't get all slutty and whatnot!

Jennifer Thompson Rooney hooker Wayne Rooney prostitute

Oh well. What do we think? Will Coleen kick him out, or will she show the same level of forgivne$$ that Abbi Clancy and John Terry's wife has?

Wayne Rooney pictures, Wayne Rooney prostitute, Wayne Rooney

Comments

How about they play all Footie games behind closed doors WITHOUT all the fans, the games are totally ignored by the papers, the players are part-time and have to earn a living OUTSIDE Footie and WE don't start giving a shit until they win the World Cup?
ken tate Mon, 06/09/2010 - 22:51
Prostitutes: a bunch of children with too little money
switch Mon, 06/09/2010 - 13:53
I'm going to start a finishing school for young footballers whereby I can impart my wisdom and guide them along the path to being a successful footballer in todays media mine-field.

Step 1 - Don't get married until you are 35
Step 2 - Go off and fuck as many whores and stupid WAG wannabe slappers as you like....nobody will give a shit.
Step 3 - That's it, you are now able to do football & sex without any of the inherent risks of being tied down to someone.

It's a simple course (they are footballers after all) but I think it will create a much more harmonious environment for todays modern footballers and then we can win the World Cup. I don't want thanks or praise for devising this method, just lots of money please.
The Rev Jesse Custer Mon, 06/09/2010 - 12:30
That's the same,not more Fuckers.
arthurport Mon, 06/09/2010 - 11:56
Football is one of the few legal environments where you get the dangerous combination of young men and lots of money.

Usually, it's older men who have lots of money. And they are constantly shagging young prostitutes, but because they're not football stars, there's no value in going to the NOTW. So it remains behind closed doors.

Women don't seem to matter whether the men are young or old - as long as they've got lots of money.

More random observations after the break...
fuckwit Mon, 06/09/2010 - 11:13
Football is one of the few legal environments where you get the dangerous combination of young men and lots of money.

Usually, it's older men who have lots of money. And they are constantly shagging young prostitutes, but because they're not football stars, there's no value in going to the NOTW. So it remains behind closed doors.

Women don't seem to matter whether the men are young or old - as long as they've got lots of money.

More random observations after the break...
fuckwit Mon, 06/09/2010 - 11:12
My fave thing about the NOTW story was how the prostitute (that's right, a woman who was knowingly doing another woman's husband for money) got all moral-high-groundy when Wayne asked her to come to the marital home for rumpy-pumpy.

"But, as far as I'm concerned, paying a girl to have sex with you is one thing. Paying a girl to come back to your marital home when your pregnant missus is out is taking it a step too far.

"Especially when you know you could easily go somewhere else to get what you want.

"But to make that decision to do it in your house, I thought that was a bit much. You're really bringing your dirty washing home, aren't you?"

Oh, Jenny, you're really a tart with a fucking heart, aren't you.

Footballers: a bunch of children with too much money.
tescopop Mon, 06/09/2010 - 10:52
Does Colleen's price for staying go up each time he gets caught? £200 for a pack of cigarettes and £1,000 for a shag.....I'm guessing she'll give him one more chance and then take the lot.
slug Mon, 06/09/2010 - 10:27
That headline will be one to cut-out and keep for the scrap-book to show young Kai when he's older -

"Ere' ah kidder this is the time when ya Dad got exposed as a fooking dirty bast'd and ya Mam was shown up to be a cheap slapper who stayed with him for his money"

It's the memories that make it all worthwhile.....
The Rev Jesse Custer Mon, 06/09/2010 - 10:17

That headline will be one to cut-out and keep for the scrap-book to show young Kai when he's older -

"Ere' ah kidder this is the time when ya Dad got exposed as a fooking dirty bast'd and ya Mam was shown up to be a cheap slapper who stayed with him for his money"

It's the memories that make it all worthwhile.....
The Rev Jesse Custer Mon, 06/09/2010 - 10:17
Does Colleen's price for staying go up each time he gets caught? £200 for a pack of cigarettes and £1,000 for a shag.....I'm guessing she'll give him one more chance and then take the lot.
slug Mon, 06/09/2010 - 10:27
My fave thing about the NOTW story was how the prostitute (that's right, a woman who was knowingly doing another woman's husband for money) got all moral-high-groundy when Wayne asked her to come to the marital home for rumpy-pumpy.

"But, as far as I'm concerned, paying a girl to have sex with you is one thing. Paying a girl to come back to your marital home when your pregnant missus is out is taking it a step too far.

"Especially when you know you could easily go somewhere else to get what you want.

"But to make that decision to do it in your house, I thought that was a bit much. You're really bringing your dirty washing home, aren't you?"

Oh, Jenny, you're really a tart with a fucking heart, aren't you.

Footballers: a bunch of children with too much money.
tescopop Mon, 06/09/2010 - 10:52
Football is one of the few legal environments where you get the dangerous combination of young men and lots of money.

Usually, it's older men who have lots of money. And they are constantly shagging young prostitutes, but because they're not football stars, there's no value in going to the NOTW. So it remains behind closed doors.

Women don't seem to matter whether the men are young or old - as long as they've got lots of money.

More random observations after the break...
fuckwit Mon, 06/09/2010 - 11:12
Football is one of the few legal environments where you get the dangerous combination of young men and lots of money.

Usually, it's older men who have lots of money. And they are constantly shagging young prostitutes, but because they're not football stars, there's no value in going to the NOTW. So it remains behind closed doors.

Women don't seem to matter whether the men are young or old - as long as they've got lots of money.

More random observations after the break...
fuckwit Mon, 06/09/2010 - 11:13
That's the same,not more Fuckers.
arthurport Mon, 06/09/2010 - 11:56
I'm going to start a finishing school for young footballers whereby I can impart my wisdom and guide them along the path to being a successful footballer in todays media mine-field.

Step 1 - Don't get married until you are 35
Step 2 - Go off and fuck as many whores and stupid WAG wannabe slappers as you like....nobody will give a shit.
Step 3 - That's it, you are now able to do football & sex without any of the inherent risks of being tied down to someone.

It's a simple course (they are footballers after all) but I think it will create a much more harmonious environment for todays modern footballers and then we can win the World Cup. I don't want thanks or praise for devising this method, just lots of money please.
The Rev Jesse Custer Mon, 06/09/2010 - 12:30
Prostitutes: a bunch of children with too little money
switch Mon, 06/09/2010 - 13:53
How about they play all Footie games behind closed doors WITHOUT all the fans, the games are totally ignored by the papers, the players are part-time and have to earn a living OUTSIDE Footie and WE don't start giving a shit until they win the World Cup?
ken tate Mon, 06/09/2010 - 22:51