Katie Waissel and her prostitute granny
OAProzzie
Sun, 21/11/2010 - 15:32 byIn what is the best news we've heard all weekend, the News Of The World has revealed that Katie Waissel's grandmother is a secret £250-an-hour hooker. The woman is EIGHTY ONE YEARS OLD and goes by the name of 'Grand Dame Cecilia Bird'. Now we see where Katie gets it from, etc etc...
Whatever you do, readers, please try not to imagine your own gran cracking a whip and wearing nothing but fishnets. That will only ruin any element of enjoyment to this story...
According to the tabloid, on the day they interviewed Sheila (or the Grand Dame, as she prefers to be known), the part-time pensioner/part-time prozzie had just entertained a 42-year-old French chef at her residential home. They hilariously observe that she "still has nearly all her own teeth", and quote her as saying:
"He brings me yoghurts and bananas and fruit and he says to me you must eat breakfast first.
And then we go upstairs and look at porn on the internet, which enjoys and I enjoy. Then we go to bed. After that he comes downstairs and he has a bit more. He brought me some cream caramels. He likes those. I like them too."
Anyone else struggling to keep up their own breakfast right now?
She continued to tell the NOTW mole, after taking him upstairs to a hotel bedroom, that "we always have a glass of wine and we sit and we talk and we watch the television or whatever for a bit. And then we have a kiss and a cuddle". So you see, it's all harmless, innocent fun! Apart from the part afterwards where the frail, 81-year-old lady has rampant sex with a young man in return for the equivalent of five hundred packets of Werther's Originals in bank notes.
Dear Katie Waissel: you're a bigger drama queen than Danyl Johnson, the most hated X Factor contestant in history, have scraped through the bottom two four weeks in a row and now we've discovered that your granny is a OAProstitute. Isn't it about time you admitted defeat, left the competition and disappeared out of the public eye for good?
Anyway, once you've finished throwing up, you can go and look at Grand Dame Cecilia's profile page by clicking here. Enjoy...
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Comments
Brain dead am I Fooku?... I am in media mainly in the US and if you had half a brain you would realise that you are the one who's brain dead... you are reacting defensively on behalf of someone who doesnt need your help... and your defense of Tweedy is pathetic in the extreme..
Katie Weasel is a two bit hustler who I meet all day long in the entertainment business... If you had half a brain and are able to understand non-verbal commuinication I would suggest you go back and look at her totally contrived first audition... look at her eyes ..they reflect someone who is totally confident and playing a part... at no stage do they register concern as to the outcome... it was all utter bollocks... the drama of collapsing on the stage in the sing off... once again take a look at her eyes and the disengenous smile... she already knew the outcome... non-verbal subconscious signals never lie..
when she comes out with such utter shit... such as I wanna be a star and a legend an Oscar winner and the nobel prize for medicine.. you have a totally narrcistic self absorbed piece of shit... who deserves everything she gets...
she is totally aided and abetted by a fucked up family who have never told her NO... her mother even invokes the religous card at outset telling all jews to vote for her because she is jewish....
I am surprised it has taken her family this long to scream anti-semitism over all the shit she's deservedly been taking..
People hate her because she is a total cunt... not because of race or religion...
I feel sorry for her granny... there is going about her life and probably fucking her way into the afterlife ... and this happens to her... talk about going out with a bang!!..
It comes to somthing when she's the only honest one amongst that whole disgraceful fame hungry fucked up family... at least you know exactly what you're gonna get with her.. you pays your money and you takes your chance...
The Weasel is a controlling manipulating sociopathic cunt and should be treated like one..
The sooner she fucks off back into obscurity the better....
And she can take you ... you fucking twat with her..
Who the fuck are these cunts slagging off the article? Fuck off you arseholes, nobody is jealous. Who could be jealous of cheryl's catflap arsehole, so pounded by chav and mixed race piping, she let loose a guff on live tv, the dirty council house bitch. Which lunatic would be jealous of cher's passchendale pock marked face and crystal meth teeth? And yet still who would imagine feeling jealous over katie weasels ironing board chin and smack head hair? Not us....you pony.
Fair play to the old bint, she still probably has more talent than her lantern-jawed granddaughter.
FUCK OFF
The dimple, the naff pose, the tit baring risque top.... why it could be the Nation's Sweetheart in 40 years time..hopefully.
now we know where she gets her desperation for being in front of the camera from.
enterprising nanna, good on her
It gives a whole new meaning to the phrase "doing bird". I can't feel too sorry for Katie. This is the business she is in. And I certainly don't feel for her nan. In auterity Britain what better way to top up one's pension? She's using her nouse. So to speak.
I dont give a shit about the programme nor the people in it. I feel sorry for this girl though because it seems she is hated for no apparent reason, and the programme does nothing to protect her purely because they only care about getting their product in the papers. They dont care about the actual people.
Saying that in this case this article is about as FUCKING PATHETIC AS IT GETS. Most people might feel a bit of sympathy for someone who has her gran outed as a prostitute by the paper, but you actually think its something to attack her for??? WTF Holy Moly!!! What a stupid and nasty fucking thing to do
MAT OR REBECCA TO WIN!!!!!! GET WAN*ER OUT!!!!
Well he is only in because the BRAIN DEAD are voting for him. People think that if they vote for Wan*er it is annoying Simon? Simon is laughing all the way to the bank. Everytime they vote its more money for Simon. Wan*er is a manipulating slimeball!!! You Ally are just jealous of Cheryl, Katie & Cher.
Wagner is the most hated on the X Factor... yet he remains in the competition and hasn't once entered the bottom two. Please explain your logic.
Think its more like you are extremely jealous of Cheryl and Katie....You've probably got a face like a dogs boll*cks!!! Wagner is the most hated on X-Factor!
Whats that got to do with Katie??? What a nasty piece of sh*t you really are!!! Holy moly is sh*t!!
At least we know who Wayne Rooney will be voting for.
If you want this girl to just go away, stop adding to fuel to the fire and giving her even more publicity. For me, ignorance is bliss when it comes to wankfests such as the Cunt Factor and the no-mark bollock-brains it seems to attract, like flies around horseshit. Which seems a fitting simile for this annual non-event. I honestly would not know what the trash-rags would put on their front-pages were it not for this dogwank. I can't remember life before it and I don't even read any slag-rags - the front pages just scream at me from the news-stands!
HM, put a stop to this madness. I feel like the only person on God's Earth who couldn't give a duck's dick about this and it's driving me to the brink of insanity and back!!
The news of the world are not fit to even call themselves good gossip hounds.Didnt they do the extra work to find out that she is also a porn star:
http://www.britishgrannyfuck.com
The news of the world are not fit to even call themselves good gossip hounds.Didnt they do the extra work to find out that she is also a porn star:
http://www.britishgrannyfuck.com
If you want this girl to just go away, stop adding to fuel to the fire and giving her even more publicity. For me, ignorance is bliss when it comes to wankfests such as the Cunt Factor and the no-mark bollock-brains it seems to attract, like flies around horseshit. Which seems a fitting simile for this annual non-event. I honestly would not know what the trash-rags would put on their front-pages were it not for this dogwank. I can't remember life before it and I don't even read any slag-rags - the front pages just scream at me from the news-stands!
HM, put a stop to this madness. I feel like the only person on God's Earth who couldn't give a duck's dick about this and it's driving me to the brink of insanity and back!!
At least we know who Wayne Rooney will be voting for.
Whats that got to do with Katie??? What a nasty piece of sh*t you really are!!! Holy moly is sh*t!!
Think its more like you are extremely jealous of Cheryl and Katie....You've probably got a face like a dogs boll*cks!!! Wagner is the most hated on X-Factor!
Wagner is the most hated on the X Factor... yet he remains in the competition and hasn't once entered the bottom two. Please explain your logic.
Well he is only in because the BRAIN DEAD are voting for him. People think that if they vote for Wan*er it is annoying Simon? Simon is laughing all the way to the bank. Everytime they vote its more money for Simon. Wan*er is a manipulating slimeball!!! You Ally are just jealous of Cheryl, Katie & Cher.
MAT OR REBECCA TO WIN!!!!!! GET WAN*ER OUT!!!!
I dont give a shit about the programme nor the people in it. I feel sorry for this girl though because it seems she is hated for no apparent reason, and the programme does nothing to protect her purely because they only care about getting their product in the papers. They dont care about the actual people.
Saying that in this case this article is about as FUCKING PATHETIC AS IT GETS. Most people might feel a bit of sympathy for someone who has her gran outed as a prostitute by the paper, but you actually think its something to attack her for??? WTF Holy Moly!!! What a stupid and nasty fucking thing to do
It gives a whole new meaning to the phrase "doing bird". I can't feel too sorry for Katie. This is the business she is in. And I certainly don't feel for her nan. In auterity Britain what better way to top up one's pension? She's using her nouse. So to speak.
now we know where she gets her desperation for being in front of the camera from.
enterprising nanna, good on her
The dimple, the naff pose, the tit baring risque top.... why it could be the Nation's Sweetheart in 40 years time..hopefully.
FUCK OFF
Fair play to the old bint, she still probably has more talent than her lantern-jawed granddaughter.
Who the fuck are these cunts slagging off the article? Fuck off you arseholes, nobody is jealous. Who could be jealous of cheryl's catflap arsehole, so pounded by chav and mixed race piping, she let loose a guff on live tv, the dirty council house bitch. Which lunatic would be jealous of cher's passchendale pock marked face and crystal meth teeth? And yet still who would imagine feeling jealous over katie weasels ironing board chin and smack head hair? Not us....you pony.
Brain dead am I Fooku?... I am in media mainly in the US and if you had half a brain you would realise that you are the one who's brain dead... you are reacting defensively on behalf of someone who doesnt need your help... and your defense of Tweedy is pathetic in the extreme..
Katie Weasel is a two bit hustler who I meet all day long in the entertainment business... If you had half a brain and are able to understand non-verbal commuinication I would suggest you go back and look at her totally contrived first audition... look at her eyes ..they reflect someone who is totally confident and playing a part... at no stage do they register concern as to the outcome... it was all utter bollocks... the drama of collapsing on the stage in the sing off... once again take a look at her eyes and the disengenous smile... she already knew the outcome... non-verbal subconscious signals never lie..
when she comes out with such utter shit... such as I wanna be a star and a legend an Oscar winner and the nobel prize for medicine.. you have a totally narrcistic self absorbed piece of shit... who deserves everything she gets...
she is totally aided and abetted by a fucked up family who have never told her NO... her mother even invokes the religous card at outset telling all jews to vote for her because she is jewish....
I am surprised it has taken her family this long to scream anti-semitism over all the shit she's deservedly been taking..
People hate her because she is a total cunt... not because of race or religion...
I feel sorry for her granny... there is going about her life and probably fucking her way into the afterlife ... and this happens to her... talk about going out with a bang!!..
It comes to somthing when she's the only honest one amongst that whole disgraceful fame hungry fucked up family... at least you know exactly what you're gonna get with her.. you pays your money and you takes your chance...
The Weasel is a controlling manipulating sociopathic cunt and should be treated like one..
The sooner she fucks off back into obscurity the better....
And she can take you ... you fucking twat with her..