In news that will shock and amaze and maybe even upset many of our readers, non-judgementally-sized singer singer Adele has announced that she's taking a five year break from her work, evn though all it currently seems to involve is being at the top of all the charts. Doesn't sound that hard. However she's made her decision and it seems as if it's not the work that she's tired of, but the problems it creates in her lovelife. SHE'S DOING IT ALL FOR THE LOVE OF A GOOD MAN.

Speaking to Vogue Magazine, Adele revealed the devastating announcement with charming aplomb:

"I am fucking off for four or five years. If I am constantly working, my relationships fail.

"So at least now I can have enough time to write a happy record. And be in love and be happy.

"And then I don't know what I'll do. Get married. Have some kids. Plant a nice vegetable patch."

So there you go. Not much you can do about that. Anyone like to place a bet as to how long she's actually away for? Six months at most, we reckon.