We're not sure how many of our readers here on Holy Moly are unable to see (physically speaking) the truckloads of useless shit we churn out everyday, but we reckon there's got to be a few of you. After all, there's an innate human need to hear offensive similes about Vanessa Feltz waistline and Kelly Osbourne's jaw, even if you can't see how out of proportion they are for yourself, and we're here to fulfil that need.

Perhaps in the future we'll be able to have a 3D version of Holy Moly where you'll actually able to feel our comparisons. For instance you could look at at a picture of Lizzie Cundy and then a 3D model of a human testicle filled with screws would rise up out of a pad on your desk, so you could actually feel exactly what we meant. Amazing, huh?

Of course, this is only useful if you can't actually go and touch the real thing (legally, of course). If you can touch the real thing then most of our future plans (secret!) for the company are up shit creek. So when Stevie Wonder starts to throw money at organisations who do exactly that, we can't help but get a bit nervous, in this case on his recent visit to the new Martin Luther King, Jr statue in Washington DC:

"I want to personally and emotionally thank you, Harry Johnson [CEO of the Martin Luther King, Jr. National Memorial Project Foundation], for making it possible for me to see the monument,"

"He made it possible for me to go up in the cherry picker and touch the face of Dr. King,"

"What I'd like to do before I say anything more is, through the Wonder Foundation, commit the Foundation to $10,000 a year that will allow as many people that are blind to go up in the cherry picker and see this. And if that don't cover it, I guess I'll have to sell some more records."

So yes, essentially this is about Stevie Wonder giving $10,000 to enable blind people to go and touch the face of Martin Luther King Jr's statue, but we knew if we told you that straight away you probably wouldn't want to look at it, so ha ha, we tricked you into reading a heartwarming story. 

Ha ha, your heart is warmer that when you arrived.