Stop everything you're doing! Cancel the reservation at your local authentic pasta house, return those over-priced scented candles/crotchless pants and hold the Cava - Gwyneth Paltrow is here to tell you how Valentine's Day is really done... 

Right, pen and paper ready - here are some of the highlights from the Goop guide to Valentine's Day... Although, as Gwynnie points out, you can bring a bit of carb free magic to any time of day on any day of the week... FYI, we think she forgot to put in the disclaimer that she's not to be held responsible if anyone gets dumped over the lack of booze, chips and chocolates. Seriously, we think she might've mixed it up with her guide to giving up good shit for Lent.

We hope you're reading, Chris Martin!