Remember when that Winter Wonderland in the New Forest got shut down because an elf sicked-up over a dog dressed as a Rudolf and Santa Claus was actually a scam artist from Ringwood? Well, here's Katie Price trying to do one better in a red Dracula cloak and two depressed looking reindeers gnawing at the concrete floor. CHRIST to the MAS-sive.

Katie Price has a new book out for Christmas, although we're fairly sure she'll be dressed up Guy Fawke's style by the end of the week (again) so let's not get ahead of ourselves. It's called Santa Baby and this is the plot:

In Katie's seventh and latest novel, SANTA BABY, Angel's glamour days are behind her, she's happily married to Cal and hoping to have another baby. But, as ever, drama is just around the corner, when Angel meets her half sister Tiffany for the time.....

As soon as they meet, Angel and Tiffany feel as if they've know each other for years, and before she knows it, Tiffany is working as a stylist on Angel's TV programme, and going out with Raul, a Brazilian racing driver who has all the girls after him.

If only Angel's sexy bodyguard Sean could be as welcoming.Obviously he has things on his mind, like the kidnap threat hanging over Angel and her daughter Honey. As everyone gathers at Angel and Cal's mansion for Christmas, Sean's defences finally drop. But as he relaxes, Tiffany finds herself in terrible danger....

Now pretend you never ever read that and watch this like all that bad bad stuff didn't happen...