As everybody knows, a calendar you can't actually write on is about as useful as a canoe made out of Berocca tablets. Unless, of course, it features Kelly Brook in her underwear. And you're a prison inmate...

Apparently this is the official Kelly Brook calendar. Now, we're sure the target audience aren't likely to scrutise the photography style, but we're still a little surprised. More to the point, it seems to only go up to June 2012. What happens in July? Is that when Brook boredom is pencilled to kick-in or are the manufacturers just assuming that by then all the pages will be stuck together anyway? Our favourite is April where Brook appears to be sat on the lavatory. April showers they call it.

FYI, Kelly's boyfriend appeared on his own calendar once. It was a little bit different.