As our nation continues its decline into a third world state, it seems that it's now become acceptable for musicians to post pictures of themselves naked on the internet, accessible to all.

As if we weren't in enough trouble with the current meteoric rise in popularity of rape, violent computer games, murder and marijuana, now the values instilled in us by the church state are being eroded as we watch. The word you're looking for is antidisestablishmentarianism*.

Don't they realise that by doing exactly this sort of activity they are helping to accelerate the tearing asunder of what moral fibre remains in our hedonistic society? Do they think it's reasonable to use their sexuality to improve record sales? Do they think it's acceptable to sell sex to young children, children who look up to them as role models?

NO. The answer is no. It's time to take a stand. Otherwise, where does it stop? What next? Maybe in their next picture they'll peel off their skins? Maybe they'll be showcasing their organs to billions of toddlers across the globe as they play space guitar and sing about the human race's eventual destruction as they're crushed to death between a pair of galaxy-sized metaphorical breasts?

What can you do about it? Ring your local MP. Write a letter to them. Email your local council. Get your voice heard. Post urine-soaked bags of human poo though the PM's letterbox if you have to. The rot must stop here. We are the final barrier against a tide of filth and depravity. We must stand strong.

HI, McFly GUYS! MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ONE AND ALL! GOOD WORK DOUGIE AND HARRY! WELL DONE FOR FOLLOWING THROUGH WITH YOUR PROMISE TO GET NAKED IF HARRY WON STRICTLY COME DANCING!

*Come on, we were close to the meaning. It's Christmas, after all.