In your face, London Film Festival - look what Paris has got, only bloomin' well RPattz! The spade-faced actor was in France promoting The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn, which has been divided into several parts to be released at yearly intervals between now and the end of eternity. Unless someone plunges a stake through its heart.

Sorry for the spoiler, but this is the film where Bella and Edward finally smile DO IT. Yes, vampires can get erections, despite having no blood (or charisma) in this film.

We've just looked at the trailer - check out 1.39, Bella has a bloaty stomach and Edward says '"Breaking Dawn? Breaking Wind more like!" Or at least we guess that happens.

Aside from that, the only other thing we've learnt from this story is that 'Révélation' is French for 'Breaking Dawn', and we suspect that's not even true.