I couldn't believe my tired little eyes this morning. Both Aisleyne and Jodie Marsh out on the piss to celebrate the launch of Aisleyne's autobiography. These pictures will be like an optrex wash on your peepers, soothing them with their tint of tobacco, Malibu and FakeBake.

We don't know what's worrying us more - the fact that Jodie Marsh is almost looking vaguely attractive (although we can't for the LIFE of us work out why she dumped her lesbian phase so quickly), or the fact that Aisleyne's nipple keeps winking at us, sending us mysterious signals as it tries to escape from the death clutch of that blue dress. Oh, and Imogen from Big Brother turned up (I can't even muster up the enthusiasm to google her surname) just to remind everyone that she is responsible for the best celeb porno ever, and those bitches have got some catching up to do.