Gwyneth Paltrow has been publishing a set of self-congratulatory guides to life on the internet called 'GOOP'. In these she gives tips on how to live a decent life (avoid meat and fish), how to cook for your family (avoid meat and fish) and how to have a lovely, individual festive season (clue: it doesn't involve meat or fish).

Despite Gwyneth portraying herself as the ultimate earth mother, it appears she isn't the only person out there with the tactic. Yes, there's another person patting herself on the back frantically and spitting out patronising phrases like a machine gun, and though most people would hide in the shadows in shame, Mary Kate Hearon claims that her whole hippy-shit idea has been plagiarised by Gwyneth.

 

Mary produces a weekly newsletter called 'The Weekly Beet' which deals with healthy eating and how to get the best out of the mind, body and spirit (without cracking a smile at any point).

 

It seems Mary met Gwyneth some years ago and introduced her to this worthy newsletter, and now Mrs. Martin has begun doling out her own home-spun wisdom along similar lines. She nicked the fucking format basically, claims the ever-smiling Mary, who found that when she next met Paltrow, the actress was somewhat icy and was,

 

"Sooooooo nasty to me, it was scandalous! Chris Martin, the utmost gentleman, stood to shake my hand, but she smirked and was silent when I asked how her dinner was . . . I never thought in a million years she'd . . . create her own site very similar to The Weekly Beet . . . Goop has the therapies I've tried, the foods I love, the detoxes that work! A lot of the same stuff!"

 

Wow. Gwyneth's utterly shit idea may have been stolen? Is this two women battling to be the most overbearing and smug people on the planet? It's the epitome of two bald men fighting over a comb, and a reminder to stay well away from both women's work.