If you're looking for Rock n' roll excess then it's probably fair to say that you won't be needing to examine the roster of stars that the ultra-Christian Disney franchise are pushing down the throat of the music world at the moment. Even worse than Miley Cyrus are The Jonas Brothers, an opaque and anodyne trio that make 'Hanson' look like 'Slipknot' on speed.

Jim Morrison once took so much peyote that he was convinced that he was being haunted by a dead American Indian. Jimmy Hendrix seemed convinced he could chop down a mountain with the edge of his hand. Coldplay once annoyed a businessman by sharing a lift with him, farting and running away on the third floor (they're crazy guys - they were staying on the fifth floor!)

 

The Jonas Brothers went to Madame Tussaud's in New York and got scared by some waxworks…

 

Despite the fact that Kevin, Joe and Nick were at the waxworks to unveil statues of themselves, the brave brothers still managed to get freaked out by effigies of other people made from plastic and wax.

 

The trio wandered into a back room full of waxy replacement limbs and heads, precisely the type of room where the sculpted body parts of people who aren't famous anymore are left in storage (and where their recently-unveiled statues will be appearing in about eighteen months time). And it scared them. Because these body parts looked like real body parts, albeit with a waxy look and obviously made out of wax. First up to blub like a baby was Joe Jonas.

 

"They closed off the haunted section and all of a sudden I'm seeing, like, Abraham Lincoln. All the lights were off. There was, like, a closet of this stuff they use occasionally and Hillary Clinton's head was on the ground."

 

Brr! Utterly terrifying. Unfortunately, his brother Kevin was even more traumatised by the visit.

 

"There was a lady stuck to the wall with an axe through her. She looked real... I was like, 'Ah, I didn't do it!'"

 

It's alright poppet, no-one is blaming you. It's a waxwork. Notice that there's no comment from Nick Jonas. He's still stuck somewhere in the basement sobbing uncontrollably and utterly traumatised by a birthday cake with a load of candles on the top. The prick.