Kanye West, Guinness World Record Holder for the biggest ego on the planet has been charged with three felonies following a scuffle with a photographer at LAX airport last September. Kanye normally uses his pulsing ball of massive self-esteem to push away the gentlemen of the press but on this occasion he resorted to using his incredibly-talented fists.

Kanye's manager Don Crowley (surely the easiest job in the world, as Kanye can just summon up whatever he wants through the force of his massive brain) was charged with six crimes after a photographer's camera was broken. Hulking man-mountain Kanye couldn't quite summon up the energy (or the bottle) to attack the camera, but once Crowley was holding it he did manage to grab the flash, smashing it onto the ground, like a great big caveman.

 

Quite why they're bothering with the prosecution is anyone's guess as no prison can hold Kanye's massive mind, but he has been charged with vandalism, battery and grand theft, the last of which is obviously just taking the piss but welcome nonetheless.

 

If convicted of all counts he could spend two and a half years of your puny mortal years in jail fending off admirers, though it's unlikely he'll see the inside of a cell because face it, he's basically just too brilliant for all that. A more reasonable sentence would be for him to stop talking about himself for a week. Now that'd really make him suffer.