Cannon will beg to be fired
Wed, 11/02/2009 - 01:00 by chrisns
Perhaps Nick Cannon is getting tired of sitting around eating bowlfuls of diamonds and bathing in swan milk, as the husband of Mariah Carey has only gone and got himself a job! Perhaps he has realised that the bird in a gilded cage does not sing so sweetly? Or maybe he's just bored at having to tell Mariah how brilliant she is every moment of the day and wants to get out of the house before the next delivery of tiny dogs and fur coats?

Anyway, Nick is taking Jerry Springer's old role, sadly not introducing redneck Klansman lesbians to their own sisters and mothers (who happen to be the same person). Nick will replace Springer as host of 'America's Got Talent' and if anyone can spot a sure thing it's the man who married Mariah Carey and her money.

 

Nick can draw on his extensive skills as an entertainer and producer to present the show. Stop giggling at the back, he's not just a pretty face (as well as a lucky bastard).

 

"I'm thrilled to be working with NBC (who) understands my vision as not only an entertainer but as a creative show producer. I look forward to working with the network and their executive team on 'America's Got Talent' and other shows to come."

 

If you're choosing to go out to work then why not cherry-pick the best job out there? Who could deny that this show is maybe the greatest in the history of television? Nick will be working with the finest minds of this (or any other generation) as his panel of three judges comprise of David Hasselhoff, Piers Morgan and Sharon Osbourne.

 

I give him three weeks before he's back shivering in the mansion's luxury bathroom and complaining that the outside world is 'a scary place, mummy.'

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