LANACANE CHAFFING CREAM

Comments (13)

Lanacane Chaffing Cream

If your legs are chaffing, your legs are too fat. You don't need to buy cream, you need to stop buying pies.

COMMENTS

clee984 says...

Funniest post for ages.

minxybbw says...

I put lanacane on my tits to stop them chaffing on my knees. Pass me a Fray Bentos please.

merylhighground says...

Call me a pedantic cunt (and you may) but it's chafing. Take it from a woman who knows how to disguise the odour of WD40

minxybbw says...

Can you disguise the smell of UB40 too Meryl? I shagged Ali Campbell last night and I can't get the smell of his Jizz out?

PS. Pedantic cunt.

merylhighground says...

Have you tried the red, red wine douche? Never fails down my parts

minxybbw says...

I tried that, but every time I squirted my poor customers looked like their cocks had had a Bobbitt job performed on them. Was funny looking at their shocked faces though

Blartmonster says...

You lying cunt, Meryl - I had to bring the fucking vat of Castrol Axle Grease to ream your spacious minge last time, it took ages to get that shit out of my fucking Calvins

TheDuke09 says...

I've stopped doing Saturday Night, Fat Night - taking that buxom bird home cos my vodka monocle makes her slim. It's far too much like hard work.

You try to go in through the front and you get boxed in by the tree trunk legs and have a panic orgasm through claustrophobia.

Get 'em on top and your view is just pure flesh. All your walls obscured my a mound of pale skin like a haunted house.

Do it from behind and you can about reach her clunge with the tip of your bell-end cos her arse is so fucking huge. You spend your time slapping blood into your old chap and saying "giz a sec". You may as well fist her. She'd never know cos she can't see past her own bum cheeks.

Nope, not for me anymore.

minxybbw says...

You could have found a better way to dump me Duke, you bastard!

merylhighground says...

The cunt has gone all squeamish since the time he said he felt a heartbeat in my clunge. Picky bastard. You'd never think there was a credit crunch on

minxybbw says...

...When we all know that it was not a heartbeat but a small terrier he had stuck up there for afters. We are well rid of him meryl.

TheDuke09 says...

Oh...errrr....sorry minxy. Didn't know you was still around. Must catch up again soon *uncomfy silence*...errrrr, there's a Ronnie Biggs post down there that no-ones commented on. I'd better go. See ya round yeah? *runs*

Blartmonster says...

Minxy, where the fuck did my Rottweiler get to when I came round for some SevenUp?? It's just that she has chronic wind and no amount of fanny farts will disguise a canine guff