Paris Hilton to star in Todd Solondz movie

According to advance word, the movie will be a family comedy set against the backdrop of a war, which will also act as a 'part-sequel' to Happiness. And hey: seeing as that film featured a scene with a dog frenziedly licking up semen, maybe this won't be a million miles away from Paris's usual forte after all.

Not sure what the atmosphere is going to be like on set, though. So far other people rumoured to be linked to the film include Faye Dunaway, Dennis Franz and Hope Davis - all talented professionals who probably wouldn't take well to acting alongside a woman so stupid she may well have been possessed by a lobotomised ghost.

Paris is, of course, presently lighting up cinema screens with her star turn in 'Repo! The Genetic Opera' and treated us to an acting odyssey back in 2005 with horror film 'House Of Wax'. And hey: seeing as that movie featured dim American girls getting covered in gloopy white liquid, maybe it wasn't a million miles away from…

Oh, you get the idea.

by CJ