Maybe it's just the huge, round head and the constant idiotic smile, but rumours persist that Mariah Carey will soon announce to the world that she is expecting a baby, and can you imagine how she'll dress the poor little mite? It's a rumour that keeps popping up every time Mariah seems to be carrying a few extra pounds (so every fortnight basically) but this time the New York Post have evidence. Well, sort of.

"Clutching what looked like a sonogram and being greeted by her entourage with cheers. She was ebullient."

I believe a sonogram is what we would call a 'scan' rather than a man who comes around to your birthday party and undresses before claiming you are his father. This time the rumour could be true, because it's certainly the first time the word 'ebullient' has been used in connection with Mariah Carey.

So tentative congratulations to Mariah and husband Nick Cannon. Nick, get ready for sleepless nights, tantrums and tears. Oh, you're probably used to it already.

by Ian McShane