We all worry about what would happen if Jim Carrey were to die. Naturally there'd be a state funeral for the Canadian funny man, huge golden busts of his funny-in-'The Mask' face would be erected and the Samaritans would have to cancel all holidays for staff. Yes, it'd be tough but the world would just about go on, even without the prospect of him appearing in another rubbish film whilst gurning and acting cheesier than a fridgeful of parmesan.

It would be even worse for Jenny McCarthy, the woman who has been Carrey's partner for longer than many thought was humanly possible, though she has aged dramatically due to his constant mirth-making causing all hope to flee from her body. Carrey has declared that he would never marry again, which must cheer Jenny up slightly. Well, now she has even better news, according to Star Magazine.

 

"He adores her and credits her with his better health and happier outlook on life. (He) wants her to have all the perks in life should anything happen to him."

 

The upshot is, should Jim die suddenly then Jenny will inherit a trust fund worth $50m, which almost makes the last few years of living with Carrey worthwhile. Luckily Jim is in rude health and should go on for years. And years. And rubber-faced, shit film-making years.

 

It's a lovely move by Jim, but one that may spell trouble for the actor. There may well be a large number of lunatics out there prepared to end Jim's life in return for a few million dollars and the chance to have a go on Jenny. There's an even larger number who would gladly pull the trigger if it meant that they didn't have to see one of his films again, and they would do it for fuck all.

 

By Ian McShane