Ronan Keating plays on your love for your mum to sell 470 extra albums

Ronan Keating - a man who sings like a parody of himself - is putting out an album for Mother's Day. It will, of course, sound like a bronchial sea lion. But he's come up with an amazing 'marketing strategy' to help 'shift units'. If you are mentally-deranged enough to be one of the first 470 people to pre-order this aural prolapse, you can get a short message to the woman who gave birth to you included in the CD.

The 'Songs For My Mother' album (possibly the worst album title of all time) is out just in time for Mother's Day and you have until 15th February to get your message on there.

If this is what you think would perfectly symbolise your love for your mum and the gratitude you must show her for bringing you up, you are very much mistaken.

You might as well stand over her face and try and wank up a turd out of your cock.

by HorseWorm

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WAIT! THERE'S MORE!

• Gary Barlow's anniversary party Cheryl Cole must be cold
• Stephen Gately's memorial held, model sells story on same day
• Stephen Gately's funeral takes place.
• Ronan Keating sporting a MASSIVE combover
• Ronan Keating makes a reappearance dressed as Indiana Jones

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