That's the price put on the Saperstein Estate in LA by the estate agent, who is probably upgrading his Mondeo to the one with CD changer and heated seats as we speak. Mariah and grinning husband Nick 'I can't believe this is happening to me' Cannon have put in an offer and hope to complete the purchase before their upcoming first wedding anniversary. It's not like they're in a chain, is it?

They say that money can't buy you taste, but in the case of this house it certainly can. Hundreds of different types of taste, every single one as vulgar as Kerry Katona in sweat pants. Shall we take a guided tour?

On the left you'll see the ballroom with gaudy ceiling frescoes, then we come to the library already stocked with first-edition books (so you can point at a book you'll never read and say 'Oh yes, it's a first edition, you know'). Two kitchens are essential to feed the guests watching 'American Idol' in the home cinema that seats fifty, who can park in the nine car garage before taking a turn around the private jogging track

The décor is 'mini-palace' with Italian marble walls, floors made from French limestone, gold-embossed leather wall coverings and 'gold leaf crowned mouldings'. Mmm. Pleasant. Or as a source close to the couple said,

"They like the home because there's so little that needs doing to it."

Which speaks volumes for Mariah's taste. Or utter lack of it.