There are many things which simply don't feature in my world and by maintaining a steadfast refusal to believe in their actual existence, my life is so much more happy and fulfilled. Some of the entries on this ever-increasing list include: coffee, liberals, facebook, the Apprentice, Big Brother and Macfly. And their fans. I have no actual concept of who or what Macfly are, but I'm pretty content with: A) my unwavering belief that they don't actually exist, and B) if they did exist they would be shit, and C) the fact that their fans are so happy to provide me with such entertainment by getting so worked up by someone else's personal opinion.

I love you, Stella.

"Putting my iTunes on shuffle is always an interesting experience, you can literally be listening to Alice Cooper one minute and Dolly Parton the next, followed by Bruce Springsteen and Elbow." Really? Literally? Fuck me!

"Oh God, that's right, you're only an internet based magazine... yes, of course you are"

It's so true. We want to be a magazine but we can't afford the paper. Sorry to break it to you but we have over a million unique users a month. The biggest music magazine in the country gets only 60,000. And that's Q and they think McFly stink of unwashed balls too.

I didn't say they weren't back (although actually they're not - it's a 50/50 deal with Universal whereby the band retain creative control). The Super City website (go on, tell us your username) wasn't created by the record label and does give them direct band-to-fan marketing and so my point still stands. So I haven't fucked up there, I'm afraid (although it's perfectly fine if I do. In your future career as a top, fair and objective music journalist you'll find you'll fuck up a lot. It doesn't make you a bad writer).

If you're gonna pick fights about McFly, sunshine. Pick 'em with someone who hasn't spent the last 6 years of their career interviewing, filming and writing about fucking McFly.

Thanks for sharing your views, and congratulations on your degree.

However, apart from the first point you pull me up on - throwing the CD out of the window, which I should explain was 1) Not actually true, and 2) Written for comedic value because, first and foremost, a review should be entertaining. I did actually listen to the whole album. It was rubbish. But I take your point about respect and fairness, however Holy Moly is not a respectful or fair website. That's not what we do here.

The problem comes with the rest of your essay. Every single other point you raise was not written by me. They were all written by Holy Moly readers like yourself, who are not and don't claim to be music journalists. So here you are going on and on about how bad my music journalism is, and the lack of research I've supposedly done, citing examples I didn't write. That, as they say, is one almighty fail with a strawberry with "ha ha!" written on it, stuck on the top.

One more thing,

"as it turns out, Habbo Hotel-style websites, enabling the band to directly market to them, free from record company hand wringing."

Super City was created once the band were back with their record label. Another thing you fucked up on reviewer, nice one.

"McFly are not and never will be considered real musicians, as their work has no artistic merit whatsoever"

Whilst I appreciate your effort in making up a phrase so ridiculous it almost sounds pretentious enough to be real, I more than completely disagree with what you have said.

I have not come on here as a 'teeny bopping' McFly fan to attack anyone that pisses on their parade, but it so happens that I have a genuine interest in why some music journalists can't or refuse to understand why McFly deserve respect as a band.

Every review I have read this evening, including this atrocious piece of journalism, lap up the opportunity to hate on McFly by picking on the same old bullshit lies they have been since the beginning, and ignore the positives. Again, since the beginning.

Here are a few things that I enjoyed, so to speak:
1)"At which point the CD was removed and thrown into the street in the hope of inciting a student riot."
Now, I know just as well as you should do, when reviewing an album you really should be listening to the whole thing. Not only out of respect for the band, but to gage a fair and satisfying opinion for your readers to appreciate and trust. Am I right?

2)"They always were a middle-class, ready-made record-company ploy to share and eventually fill a Busted-shaped void in the market"
Again, when reviewing, you really should do some research before you click the post button on your broken record droning. McFly certainly were not a ready made record company ploy. Danny and Tom met one another through James Bourne, decided to form a band, then held auditions for a bass and drum player. (That ended up as Harry and Dougie, just in case you hadn't brushed up on their names either ;) ) The last point you've made about a middle class McFly, is just so irritating that it almost leaves me with no hope for music journalism whatsoever.
(Again, in case no research had been done, only one member of the band happen to be from a 'middle class family')

3)"I'm an early 30's cynic thankyouverymuch."
Well done, aren't you high on the cool scale for being so miserable and fed up with the appauling things we have to deal with in today's society.
You almost had me there, if it wasn't for your username I would have mistaken you for Charlie Brooker himself. Oh and next time Mr. 30 something, please refrain from writing without spaces.

4)Digs about McFly's demographics are just silly, and a little contradicting on your part? Everybody knows (and AGAIN this is assuming of course as a journalist, you've done your research prior to reviewing) that McFly embark on not one but sometimes two tours a year, including theatres and arenas, most of which tend to sell out. They do also tour outside the country, ensuring their fans across the globe get to enjoy their music live too. (Yes, they do have fans elsewhere, I know you journalists who can't stand to have respect for any band other than one that split up 20 years ago or one nobody else has heard of, can quite believe this, but it's true.)

I'm ending this reply to Holy Moly! What a Shocking Review on Above the Noise, on a high. I am not angry at HM's comments, just simply amused at how arrogant music journalists can still be.
(And I'd just like to let you know, before you rattle some bullshit at me about being 12 years of age and tell me to go back to Mummy's arms, that I have just finished a degree in Multimedia Journalism in which I received a 1st, so I am quite aware of how to write a fair and respectful review).

Thank you and goodnight.

I'd just like to point out that I'm a McFly fan (and I have been since 5 Colours in her Hair first came out in 2004) and I'm not an idiot.
You speak of 'broadening your musical palette'- you have absolutely no idea what other music McFly fans listen to. Admittedly, I do have a soft spot for boybands, especially Take That and McFly (who, by the way, have never claimed to be anything BUT a boy band), I also like many other types of music. Putting my iTunes on shuffle is always an interesting experience, you can literally be listening to Alice Cooper one minute and Dolly Parton the next, followed by Bruce Springsteen and Elbow.
McFly aren't just there to fill a Busted sized 'void, they are much more than that. Look at how much work they have done for charity, most recently, Harry taking part in Strictly Come Dancing for Children in Need.
I completely understand that they are not to everyone's taste but I don't see how people can find them quite so offensive. They are just having fun!!
It's completely unnecessary to be quite so rude about McFly and their fans, not all of whom are screeching 12 year olds.
It is absolutely outrageous to pigeon hole their fans and assume that they are all idiots. We aren't.

Dear thissong12, joemccorriston, sarahtayler, tmcg20, @GatchenhasMcFly, "FU" and erm, pokeybumwank and any other McFly-loving bottom-burp,

Do you seriously suggest that if you are not one of the lucky few hundred thousand out of Earth's 7-billion strong population who are paid to create music, you are not allowed to have an opinion on music? That is absurd.

McFly are not and never will be considered real musicians, as their work has no artistic merit whatsoever, going by the material I've endured, tolerated, even, when they crop up on the radio over the years. They always were a middle-class, ready-made record-company ploy to share and eventually fill a Busted-shaped void in the market. Just because they have sold tens of millions of records over the years, that doesn't mean they are any good. All it means is that people will like and buy any old crap. And they always will as long as there is an army of idiots out there who will continue to do so. Idiots like you. You have much to learn about how this world works.

Don't bother to argue with me about their artistic credentials and (limited) musicianship. To recap, they are not "musicians" - they are a manufactured boyband who happen to play their own instruments. Come back and talk about musicianship when you have broadened your musical palette a little more and have experienced the works of Talking Heads, Gang Of Four, The Smiths, Nirvana, The Jimi Hendrix Experience and the Pixies to name but a few.

Yours sincerely,
kdddd

xxx

ps "1977" by Ash, written and partly performed by a 17-18 year-old Tim Wheeler displays the kind of talent for writing the kind-of polished, well-crafted teenage anthems which make me wonder how the likes of your beloved McFly get any credit at all...

If you really wanna wind people up (quite easily) and have a little laugh to yourself,McFLY fans are the best,even though im a die-hard fan i have on many occasion made up a fake account on McFLY forums and harrass ( and verbally rape their asses ) SO MUCH FUN!

Every day there is more joy to be had from this thread.

Hahaha that's harsh man. I respect you have your own opinion but that's going a bit far. I'm a McFly fan, were not all bed wetting spastics, only some of them are...

Amen.

Woah you need to chill the fuck out beeyatch ! Take your meds, hold your breath and count to 10, then breathe out slowly and fuck off.

You have used a lot of commas there, which would usually distress me, but your username and sensible argument make me like you. So, as Cheryl sayeth unto Mary, er, "get on with your bad self". Go on then.

I pity you, keep trying, maybe you should be able to write better, I'll be praying for it!

Errrr, right back atcha, Gatchenhas.

You want someone to die in a hole because they don't share your taste in music? Are you seriously telling me that there are no bands you have a bad word to say about?

Put down your toys, get your Mum to change you, suck your thumb for a bit, and get some sleep, dearie.

McFly and their fans have had to put up with an incredible amount of hating all throughout their 7 long years,i really dont see how Their fans havent got over it yet,being a fan myself,i read these reviews,have a little laugh and get the fuck over it,Mcfly's music relates to millions of people and have helped them through rough times in their life,but if your a McFLY fan i think you should take the shit with the shovel cos their never gonna get credibility because of the stigma attached to the genre of music they produce,and its just not cool enough for all the ''real'' music fans out there,or so they like to think,but in the end,you listen to music cos you enjoy it,going to see them live the whole experience,not to sit on an internet site being a keyboard warrior trying to defend a band that probably dont actual give a fuck about bad reviews anymore and are at home laughing/rolling around in their millions they've made and copious amount of awards,with a huge worldwide fan following to boot.
So Mcfly are good at what they do,their fans are actually lovely people,who you may be massively suprised,DO actually have a music taste like normal human beings,and arent teenie boppers who scream when they open their mouths,some of us just have a soft spot for corny pop music that has meaning to us individually.

First of all, who THE FUCK DO YOU THINK YOU FUCKING ARE?
I mean critics are supposed to be GOOD at what they do, they are supposed to KNOW about what they write about not WHO but WHAT. You write reviews about music but I don't think you actually know what it is, what effect it has on people. I'm pretty sure you haven't heard of HALF of the people you fucking write about.
Secondly you DO NOT know the meaning behind this album, why they made it, shit I'm pretty sure you haven't even heard of them before this fucking album. McFly made a great comeback from Radio:Active and it was a fucking good comeback to.
And here's something that really bugged me about this article. Well, pretty much the whole thing sort of annoyed the complete shit out of me but this was the part where I laughed AT YOU and your "journalism skills".
"'I'll Be Your Man' sees McFly ditch their boyish Beatlesque pop rock completely and stumble idiotically into wavering R&B falsetto jizz. At which point the CD was removed and thrown into the street in the hope of inciting a student riot."
Now, do you really understand what R&B actually is? Now see, you have the falsetto part right because Tom has a high pitched, but fucking amazing voice in that song. But honey, it's not R&B related or even close to it for that matter. Ask ANY R&B artist. But then again, would you fucking know any?
And let me ask you this, do you know what it's like to make an album for your fans? try something different and hoping that when it comes out on disc and all of your 7 year long fans listen to it these fans will enjoy it? Have you EVER even sold a CD? Can you even play a fucking instrument or sing for that matter?
This is not a review, it is a worthless piece of shit written out on the this page you call a website. I bet that you have not had this many people commented on an article until now. I think you know why.
This is bullshit and frankly you didn't even deserve the chance to meet McFly, have a website or even be a writer (if that's what you call yourself). So um, go die in a fucking hole.
McFly boys, I'm proud of you and so are ALL your other fans. We will always love you guys no matter what. This twat just doesn't know good music when he hears it.

You're a dick.

Know what? It's possible to like a band without assuming that everyone who DOESN'T like that band is a moron. I like The Moldy Peaches. I happily admit that there are plenty of reasons as to why others wouldn't. Their not liking said band doesn't stop me from enjoying their music because I'm a normal human being who doesn't get pissed off because of one negative review.
Who gives a shit how the songs match up to the interests of the singers/musicians who spewed it out? I don't assume that Aqua's Barbie Girl is a tour de force just because one member of the band may have collected Barbie dolls. It's a music review, for god's sake.
My advice would be to just enjoy the music you like. If you genuinely like it, why do you care that other people don't? Grow up and get on with your lives.

Well, I did not even know of its existence until I read your interview about McFly, shows how much you and biomes is superior to them, is little known and only managed a bit of recognition (recognition that to criticize yourself) then lies who wrote and lies about McFly.
You will not be a good professional is their whole life wondering, creating conflicts, and making little gossip on people, is a friend of advice, really want you to become a better person and a better professional. And one last thing, beware of using harsh words you use, in college you should have learned that in a journalistic source text must always take precedence to the proper content and quality, and unfortunately you have forgotten that.
I pity you, keep trying, maybe you should be able to write better, I'll be praying for it!

Tom, Harry, Dougie and Danny, I'm very proud of you and ignore this fool, he does not know what speech is an ignorant, do not lose sleep that you also will not lose mine because of it!

I've been a bed-wetting spastic for 7 years. McCry has THOUSANDS of institutionalised fans who are let out on day release to work in various branches of Remploy across the globe.

All of you judging them - take a listen to every song and experience your mind being wiped by pure banality, watch their tour DVDs from the last 7 years as they systematically kill whatever spark of hope for humanity you had left in your soul, meet them in person & read up on how much they've done to raise funds for the local owl sanctuary/abattoir. Then, and only then, if you still don't like them, I will kill myself - thus finally making my parents proud. That's more than fair enough.

I've been a fan for 7 years. McFly has THOUSANDS of devoted fans across the globe.
All of you judging them - take a listen to every song, watch their tour DVDs from the last 7 years, meet them in person & read up on how much they've done for charity. Then, and only then, if you still don't like them, that's more than fair enough.

And I'm an early-20s cynic!

I'm an early 30's cynic thankyouverymuch.

My God, have all these teenage girls been lurking on HM, waiting to be awakened like sleeper agents? I thought we were all middle aged cynics...

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGHHHHHH!!!111!!!!1! FATHER FINTON STACK!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Spot on apart from one minor detail: McFly fans aren't like Hitler, they're worse than Hitler.

It's Girls Can't Catch all over again.

First off I don't think McFly actually have any fans (Mummy doesn't count) so I can only assume that the posters above are either the McFly PR machine whirring into life or the boys themselves have somehow managed to find time in their hectic "woo look at me I'm a rock & roll star" lifestyles and, after having a good cry about the mean reviewy man, have decided to come out all guns blazing !

I want more, who knows maybe you can convert me to the aural pleasure that is McFly.

If I understood Twitter I'd do some, er, tweeting of my own. However, I don't. So I shan't wade into that particular affray.

I don't understand why this always happens. I love and hold dear many artists and bands, but if someone else were to think their album was a bit rubbish, I would just be like "OK, that's what you think with your mind, after hearing it with your ears, and that's fine and now I will drink a cup of tea with my mouth" I might think to myself "this reviewer clearly doesn't 'get' Fever Ray/Interpol/Girls Can't Catch, what a divv-o" but at no point would I ever make the effort to attack a reviewer or publication for daring to disagree with my opinion. Because to do so would suggest that I truly thought my own opinion was the Only One allowed. And Hitler kinda thought that. And I'm not saying that McFly fans are like Hitler, but, you know...

Oooooh!!

Don't fuck with the McFlyers (paramilitary division).

Why the overseen bunch of little twerps might have a collective spasm and then you'd be sorry!

have you seen the tweets in that panel on the home page? This is going to be FANTASTIC!

This is amazing! I LOVE IT when the trolls come to play.

And for the record, TIMC, I find your reviews (and love for Robyn) marvellous. Let the haters hate whilst you, er, do your thing.

So basically what you're saying is they've had some good reviews somewhere else, so no one else should disagree? Only in a far more boring fashion and with far too much time on your hands?

I'm guessing McFly never wrote a song about irony?

Clever boy,'TIMC' you big ballache.
Holy Holy review?
Sorry, where do you circulate?
Oh God, that's right, you're only an internet based magazine... yes, of course you are.
Of which can't actually afford and/or don't have a significant amount of cynical, manically depressive readers who oversee your absolutely awful reviews.
The only time you get hits, is from those people who are 'throwing themselves off cliffs' and need to 'grow up'.
Oh, and 'TIMC', I take it your Journalist career didn't take off very well, considering you've had to result to such a ridiculously awful ONLINE magazine?!
Next time, don't voice your opinion at all, its most definitely not wanted!

All I get out of this review is an understanding of how big a cock the reviewer is. Seeing as you not only slag off the band but those reading the review - who are invited to share their comments and disagree with what you've written - I think this is a fair judgement.

I sense a hint of resentment that they are out there being adored by hundreds of thousands of girls while having the time of their lives and that you are...stuck in an office?

Dear Holy Moly, your reviewer sucks!

You should save what you've just written and read it back ten years from now when your musical tastes have expanded past cleverly marketed boybands and Barney the fucking Dinosaur. Then, and only then, will you realise what a pant-wetting twatache you were back in the year of our lord 2010.

I don't think we've overlooked the amount of hard work or devotion put into making this record.
99.99999% of artists are devoted and work hard to complete their albums.

Unfortunately this doesn't stop a lot of them being shit. Like this one.